More Road test Ringers....

In the last post I promised some more Road Test "Ringers". I aim to please, so here they are. # 1. 1987 Buick Grand National. The Grand National was a big hit with the buff magazines in the late '80's. The '84 and earlier versions of the GN and Regal T-Type which had an electronically controlled Rochester Quadrajet Carburator on the Turbo 3.8 were erratic performers at best. Like the ill-fated Turbo Trans-Am of 1980-81-they just couldn't make the cars run and pass emissions with a Turbo and a Carburator. That all changed in 1985 with the debut of Multi-Port Fuel Injection. With MPFI the engineers could program the fuel curve precisely and set the ECM to back up the timing if detonation was detected. An intercooler also helped greatly. Now instead of stumbling and chugging and running high 15 or low 16 second 1/4 mile times, the Fuelie models ripped off blistering low to mid 14 second times. Car and Driver ran a 14.41, Hot Rod ran a 14.30. Since most L98 Corvettes ran 14.50's Buick could lay claim to building the fastest American production car. One tester however-at Englishtown New Jersey ripped off a blistering 13.85. Other magazines and Buick engineers wanted to examine the car and test it themselves. On the first pass it laid down a 13.95. Subsequent passes were a string of 14.01s, 14.03s and the slowest a 14.05. Still a good 3 or 4 tenths quicker ( 3 or 4 car lengths ) than the other magazines, but except for the first pass-no 13 second runs. It was finally ascertained that the car was running a 160 degree thermostat instead of a 195, and had a modified electric fan switch that turned the fan on at 180 degrees instead of 220. Do you think the engine running 40 degrees cooler would net a much cooler, denser fuel charge-which would help the Turbo's performance greatly? Further the car was filled with 104 octane racing gas-which would ensure that the ECM would deliver full timing all the time, rather than retarding it to run on 87 or 91 octane pump gas!!  Think this made a difference?  Lastly-the original tester also admitted that he put wet towels on the intake manifold between runs!! This all explains how this "stock" GN could break into the 13s when all others could only manage mid 14s!!  # 2. 1991 Ford Mustang LX "5.0".  Car Craft boasted about their "Basically Stock" "5.0" Mustang that ripped of a blistering 14.04 second 1/4. Since other magazines ran between 14.72 ( Hot Rod ) and 15.29 ( Road and Track ). This merited investigation. Yes CC's Mustang was "basically stock". Except for a K&N airbox and filter,a Flowmaster "Cat-Back" exhaust system, swapping the 3.08 gears for some 3.73:1s, and swapping the 225/60VR15 Goodyear Gatorbacks for 235/60R15 M&H Drag Radials. So come on guys-the car's stock-except for the intake and exhaust, stiffer gears, and stickier tires!!  I mean if your going to nit-pick.... # 3. 1992 Mitsubishi 3000GT VR4. These swoopy Japanese exotics featured a twin-turbo V6 and all-wheel drive. Their "Controlled Conditons with a professional driver" is almost as audacious as Pontiac swapping the engines in 1964. Most of the buff magazines ran 14.50s with these cars. Mitsubishi claimed a blistering 13.75. This was accomplished by disconnecting the rev limiter, disconnecting the knock sensor, filling the tank with 104 octane gas, and lowering tire pressure to 15 psi. The "professional driver" then dropped the clutch at 6,300 rpm and powershifted at 7,000 ( 500 rpm over the redline ) which grenaded the $5,749 transaxle after 3 runs!!  My neighbor had one of these cars and was totally shocked when my Hurst / Olds blew his doors off.  Not so much when I showed him the "Contolled Conditions".  Like the old saying goes only believe half of what you read and none of what you hear... Mastermind  

Road Test "Ringers" revisited....

Someone asked me the other day why production examples can almost never match the blistering 0-60 and 1/4 mile times of magazine test cars. This guy was upset because two people he knew had new cars and the performance was nowhere near what the magazines claimed. One was a Turbocharged 4-cylinder Mustang. Car and Driver's test mule ripped off a blistering 13.9 second 1/4.  The best his friend's could do was a 14.5. Definitely quick for a 4-banger, but more than 1/2 a second ( about 5 car lengths ) slower than the "Prototype". The other was a Dodge Demon Challenger. The one that has 840 hp and comes from the factory with a trans-brake and drag radials. Chrysler claims a 9.65 second 1/4 mile time. The fastest ever for a production car. This guy's buddy took his to the drags and ran 10.60's. Now that's still ungodly fast-but it's a full second off the manufacturer's claims. Are the manufacturers cheating?  Yes and no. Magazine test mules are tuned flawlessly to "The top of specifiactions". In other words they run as good as they possibly can. Production examples are hit and miss. I worked for Pontiac back in 1983. I remember we had two Trans-Am's on the lot-a black one and a white one. Both had "Cross-Fire" Injected 305 V8s and TH700R4 automatics. The white one would lay 30 feet of rubber on take-off, and lay another 8-10 feet on the 1-2 shift. The black one couldn't spin the wheels at all. Why? I don't know. Anyhow my answer to this guy was this-besides being perfectly tuned, test mules are usually filled with 100 octane gas. This insures that the engine doesn't "ping" under load, and ensures that the ECM doesn't back up the timing to avoid this. Especially on Turbocharged or Supercharged cars-this alone makes a HUGE difference. The car is going to run way better on 100 octane race gas than it will on 87 or 91 octane pump gas!!  The other thing is the test is performed "under controlled conditions with a professional driver."  That means they play with tire pressure, launch technique and shift points. Sometimes it takes them 30 passes to get the best result. A recent example was one of the magazines tested a new Subaru WRX. They listed a blistering 5.4 second 0-60 time and a 13.8 second 1/4. They did disclose that they got this by lowering tire pressure to 25 psi-( factory recommendation is 36 psi, and the tires max is 44 psi ) and popping the clutch at 5,500 rpm!!  Now who drives around in their new $40,000 WRX with 25 psi in the tires ( and low tire pressure light on ) and drops the clutch at 5,500 rpm to jump someone from a light?!  They conceded that with 36 psi in the tires and a reasonable launch-say 3,000 rpm-that the 0-60 time was closer to 6 seconds and the 1/4 mile took 14.3. Still really quick for a 3,800 lb car with a 4-cylinder engine-but not what the readers are led to believe. And sometimes in the interest of selling the cars the manufacturers do cheat. Here's some of my personal favorites. # 1. 1964 Pontiac GTO. After 50 years-Jim Wangers finally admitted what we already knew. Car and Driver's May 1964 test car that ran a blistering 4.6 second 0-60 time and a 13.1 second 1/4 was a ringer. Royal Pontiac had pulled the stock 389 and replaced it with a Blueprinted 421. In addition to the extra cubes it had thin head gaskets to raise compression, loosely adjusted valves with rocker arm lock nuts to rev higher, a mechanical throttle linkage on the Tri-Power ( instead of vacuum ) custom-jetted carbs, and a re-curved distributor. Small wonder that production examples with an assembly line built 389-could only run 14.50s.  # 2. 1969 Plymouth Road Runner 440+6. Chrysler advertised the 440 Six-Pack Road Runner as a 12 second car right off the showroom floor. The ad had a list of mid-high 12 second times they had run during testing. The test mule had a blueprinted 440 with custom-jetted carbs, a custom curved distributor, a 4-speed, a 4.30 geared posi rear end with a pinion snubber, and 28 inch drag slicks. And the "Professional Driver" was Pro Stock Champion Ronnie Sox of "Sox&Martin" fame. Shocker-Hot Rod's production example with a stock engine, 3.54 gears and street tires and a writer driving could only manage a 13.56. That's damn quick-but still nearly a full second off of the advertisements claims!!  # 3. 1973 SD-455 Trans-Am. The "Prototype" Buccaneer Red T/A that ran a blistering 13.54 for Hot Rod and 13.75 for Car and Driver was a ringer. If you look closely at the pictures you'll see the numbers on the Michigan liscence plates. It's the same car. Further-although the Road tests were published in the May and June issues-the tests were done in January. This is relevant because the SD-455 was initially going to be offered in the GTO, the Grand Prix and the Grand Am as well as Trans-Am and Formula Firebirds. "High Performance Cars" magazine made a collossal goof. They named the SD-455 1973 GTO their "Car of the Year". However-the engineers had trouble with connecting rod failure, EGR valve function,and trouble passing emissions with the hot RAIV cam. The cam was swapped for the much milder RAIII cam and hp was down-rated from 310 to 290. The project was almost scrapped. Only the tireless efforts of Herb Adams saved it, and in April 1973 the engine was finally EPA certified in the Firebird line only. That's why only 295 were built-252 T/A's and another 43 Formulas. Another 943 were built in 1974. Anyway-the prototype had the hotter RAIV cam,  an EGR-less 1972 aluminum 455HO / RAIV intake and an open "Shaker" hood scoop. Production examples had the milder RAIII cam, an iron intake with an EGR valve, and the hood scoops were bolted closed because of noise regulations. Other SD-455 cars tested by other magazines in the '73-74 period ran low 14s. Awesome performance for a 3,800 lb car with only 8.4:1 compression; but nowhere near the blistering 13.50s of the "Prototype". No one knows what happened to the prototype. Some people say it was sold to a Pontiac executive, other people say it was crushed. # 4. 1973 Olds 442. Motor Trend had a "1973 Performance Car Preview". The red and silver Cutlass 442 blew the doors off all comers including an SD-455 Trans-Am, a 454 Corvette, a 440 Dodge Charger, a 401 /4-speed AMC Javelin AMX, and a 351CJ Mustang. Olds engineers admitted that "Just for Kicks" they had re-curved the distributor, re-jetted the carb and swapped the stock cam in the 455 for the hot "W30" cam out of the 1970 442. They also put a Hurst shift kit and 2,800 rpm "Shotgun" Torque converter in the TH400 and were running 3.42:1 gears. Shocker-production examples with a stock engine and tranny and 2.73:1 or 3.08:1 gears were substantially slower!!  # 5. 1978 Dodge Li'l Red Express Pickup. I touched on this one in a recent post about one or two year wonders. Car and Driver's "Prototype" blew the doors off both an L82 / 4-speed Corvette and a W72 Trans-Am. However the 360 V8 in the "Prototype" had NASCAR-style "W2" heads,a single-plane aluminum Holley "Street Dominator" intake with a 650 Double-Pumper Holley on it, a hot cam out of the old high-performance 340 V8 and catalyst-free exhaust. Needless to say-production examples with stock heads, a stock cam,an iron intake with an EGR valve and a Carter Thermo-Quad were substantially slower, and their owners shocked when a Corvette or T/A owner showed them their taillights!!  # 6. 1978 Z/28 Camaro. Popular Hot Rodding gushed over their test car that ran blistering ( for 1978 ) 1/4 mile times in the 14.30s. Since Hot Rod' magazine's Z/28  tester ran a 15.21, and Car and Driver's ran a 15.60-this merited further investigation. Dennis and Kyle Mecham of DKM inc had great success with the "Macho T/A". Pontiac Trans-Ams that they hopped up with recurved distributors, re-jetted carbs, Hooker Headers and real dual exhausts. They also had custom graphics. The buff magazines raved, and they couldn't build them fast enough to meet demand. Since they were working out of their dad's Chevrolet / Pontiac dealership in Glendale, Arizona, they got the idea to give the "Macho" treatment to a Z/28 Camaro. Well-PHR's badass test car was the "Macho Z" prototype-it had Hooker headers and dual exhausts, the custom jetted carb, re-curved distributor, open hood scoop-the full "Macho T/A" treatment. That's why it was so much faster than a stocker. The Mecham brothers also did an L82 Corvette that had a Doug Nash 5-speed that was tested by Car Craft that got rave reviews. However-for some reason Chevy dealers weren't as enthusiastic as Pontiac dealers for selling hot-rodded cars, and the "Macho Z" and the L82S never took off like the "Macho T/A's" did. The Macho Z prototype is the only one built. It's in a musclecar museum. No one knows what happened to the L82S prototype. Maybe Dennis Mecham does. There's other cases in the '80's and '90's, but that's another post for another time.....Mastermind

R.I.P. Burt Reynolds....

I was saddened to hear that Burt Reynolds died today at age 82. He was most famous for "Smokey & the Bandit". However before he got piegenholed in dipshit comedies he had done some serious acting. He was excellent in "Deliverance" as the macho leader of a group of businessmen that run afoul of nasty hillbillies. He also played a "Dirty Harry" type detective opposite Catherine Denevue in "Hustle". And who can forget "Gator" McLuskey-the booze runnin, motor gunnin' convict who goes after the corrupt sheriff who killed his brother. Of course "Smokey and the Bandit" out-grossed everything but "Star Wars" in 1977. Somehow he got piegenholed in that "Good Ole Boy" persona-and it served him well-"Hooper" and the Cannonball Run movies were hits. It seemed like anytime he tried to do anything serious-the critics would gripe and say he should stick to lightweight comedies. I thought he did some great work in the '80's-"Sharky's Machine"-him and Clint Eastwood joked-"Dirty Harry" goes to Atlanta".  I loved "Malone" where he played an ex-CIA operative who runs afoul of white supremacists in a small Oregon town. "Heat" where he played a Vegas bodyguard with a gambling problem that has trouble with a mobster's son who brutally beat a hooker friend of his. This was re-made and re-named "Wild Card" with Jason Statham and it was awful. Burt's version is much better. I liked Physical Evidence where he was a cop accused of murdering a suspect. The uber-sexy Theresa Russel was his attorney who lived with spoiled yuppie stockbroker Ted Mc Ginley. Best line ever-Theresa and Burt are arguing about the case and McGinley comes in and interrupts them. Burt asks-"Is this His Gucciness?" Sadly-none of those were big hits and he was stuck doing dumb stuff like "The best little whorehouse in Texas" and "Stroker Ace".  In the '90's he had a hit TV show playing a football coach on the comedy "Evening Shade".  He had a renaissance of sorts playing a Porn Director in "Boogie Nights" and the owner of a Formula 1 team opposite Sylvester Stallone in "Driven". Anyhow-he was a good actor and a nice person and he will be sorely missed. May he rest in Valhalla!!  Mastermind

More on desecrating classics.....

I spoke yesterday about how I'm fine with putting an LS motor and a six-speed into one of the 400,000 Malibus Chevrolet built in 1968 alone. Just don't do it to a numbers-matching SS396 or worse yet-a Yenko!!  But I see it constantly and that's what drives me up the wall. I saw a 1965 GTO with an LS engine and a six-speed automatic in a magazine. ARRRGGGHHH!!!!  This guy couldn't buy a Tempest or LeMans and do that?  I know gearheads like to modify things in the search for extra performance. I'd be fine if this '65 GTO owner had swapped in a Tremec 5-speed to replace the Muncie 4-speed, or a TH350 to replace the 2-speed ST300. I'd be fine if he  swapped the 389 for a 421 or a 455. At least it's still basically a vintage Pontiac hot rod. If you want a new Camaro-go buy one. But don't screw  up a classic that someone else would want to preserve in original, or semi-original condition!!  Some other horrific examples I may have brought up before, but I think are worth re-visiting. # 1. This guy put a 389 Pontiac into a '57 T-Bird. What the hell was he thinking? This offended Ford and GM guys both. I know the old 292 and 312 "Y-Block" V8s are heavy dogs that have the dual attributes of no power and crappy gas mileage. He couldn't swap in a later model 289 / 302 or 351W for an instant power and drivability infusion? Or a if he had to have a big-block-a 390? At least then it would still be all Ford, and people wouldn't be storming his house with torches. # 2. This guy bought a pristine, frame-off restored 1963 Fuel-Injected,Split-Window Corvette Sting Ray and proceeded to gut the interior for a roll cage, replace the IRS with a narrowed Ford 9 Inch, and cut up the body and floor pan for wheel tubs. He then installed a tunnel-rammed 454 backed by a Powerglide with a trans-brake. Because he loved the "Pro Street" look. If you've lived in a cave the last 30 years-back in the late '80's and early 90's building cars that looked like Pro Stock drag racers was all the rage. He couldn't buy one of the millions of '68-82 C3 'Vettes out there and butcher that?  No, it had to be a for real Fuel-Injected Split-Window!!!  # 3. This guy angered both musclecar guys and Import Tuners by destroying not one, but two classics. This genius put the engine and tranny out of a 1998 Toyota Supra Turbo into a 1967 Camaro. He couldn't understand why everyone thought he should be drawn and quartered and have his entrails cut out and burned. # 4. This guy took a 1990 Mustang GT and put a Chevy LS engine in it. Why? Do you know how much trouble that is? And what did he gain?  Not performance. I know guys with "5.0" Mustangs that run in the 10s with 302s. How can he ever sell it? GM guys don't want it; Ford guys damn sure don't want it. This one really left me scratching my head. # 5. This one falls under the more money than brains category. This guy took the drivetrain out of a 1987 Buick Grand National and put it in a 1984 Pontiac Gran Prix. Huh?  Think about it. Even if the GN was totalled-if he rebuilt it and had a salvage title a nice, running '87 Grand National is always worth WAY more than any '84 Gran Prix!!! Further-transferring not only the engine and tranny-but the gas tank and fuel pump and all the wiring to run the electronics on the fuel injected, turbocharged, intercooled GN motor ( Most '84 GP's had  carburated 305 Chevy V8s ) had to be a nightmare. If a badass, ultra-quick '84 GP is your dream car-swapping in a 350 or 383 small-block Chevy would be both cheaper and a lot easier-essentially a bolt-in. The only word I can think of for this one is "Why?"  # 6. The all-time more money than brains champ-except for Jay Leno's rear drive Toronado-is this one. This clown spent $250,000-that's not a typo-I didn't mean 25 grand, I meant a quarter million. That's right-the price of a nice 3-bedroom house anywhere except New York or California-putting the engine and tranny out of 2013 GMC 2500 Turbo Diesel pickup into a 1970 Chevelle!!!  Even if he spent 50K on a pristine restored Chevelle, and 50K on the brand-new diesel pickup, how did he rack up another 100 grand in the cost of the conversion?  And again I ask "Why?"  Who in the hell wants a '70 Chevelle with a diesel truck engine?  It was fast-but he could have easily built a '70 Chevelle with a 720 hp GMPP 572 Rat motor that would have been cooler and faster for a lot less than 250K!!  I've said it before but I think sports car guys and motorcycle guys are smarter. You never see a 1969 Porsche 911S with the engine and tranny out of a 2012 Cayman. You never see a 1967 Jaguar XKE with the drivetrain out of a 2009 XK8, or a 1972 Datsun 240Z with the engine and tranny out of a 2014 370Z!!  You don't see a 1965 Harley Sportster with the engine and tranny out of a 2015 Softail!!  You don't see a 1973 Kawasaki Z1 with the engine and tranny out of 2009 Ninja!!  If you want to bastardize something do it with a base-model no one cares about not something like a '63 Split-Window, Fuel-Injected Sting Ray!!  Or a '57 T-Bird....Mastermind              

Go ahead and do a modern fuelie swap.....On certain cars...

I saw an awesome Mustang for sale on the internet the other day. It was a '68 model and the bodywork was done like the "Eleanor" Mustang that Nicolas Cage drove in the "Gone in 60 Seconds" remake. It had a 5.0 liter Coyote engine with 379 hp and 375 lbs ft of torque backed by a T56 6-speed manual. It had a full Chassisworks suspension,power Rack&Pinion steering and Wildwood 4-wheel disc brakes. It had 17" Shelby Cobra style wheels and fat, ZR-rated tires. The interior was custom with Auto Meter guages, modern a/c, and 2006 GTO seats. It looked and sounded totally badass. If I could swing a home-equity loan, I'd try to buy it. It was that cool. Now people are going to immediately call me a hypocrite and quote many past posts where I howled to the heavens about people doing modern fuelie swaps. I did-but only because  people would do shit like put an LS Chevy motor and a 4L80E into a numbers-matching 1970 Judge!! One of 3,797 ever built. I saw that exact swap in a magazine. Now-this guy couldn't buy a beater Tempest or LeMans and do that? It had to be a numbers-matching RAIII Judge!!!  Even if he "had" to have the Judge "look"-Year One, Ames, the Goat Farm, and other places can easily hook you up with a GTO hood and front bumper, spoilers, stripes etc. Another asshole did that to a one of 1,286 ( actually one of 458 4-speed models ) 455HO '72 Trans-Am!!  Again-he couldn't buy any one of millions of 1970-81 Camaros and Firebirds and use that? If he "Had" to have a Trans-Am-Pontiac built nearly 350,000 T/A's from 1975-79-he couldn't buy one of those and fuck that up?  That's my gripe. It's always a "For-Real L78 / 4-speed SS396 Chevelle". It's not just GM-guys the Mopar and Ford guys are just as bad. It's always a 440 Charger R/T or a Six-Pack Challenger that some asshole stuffs a 6.1 or 6.4 SRT8 Hemi into. You can't buy a 318 model and fuck that up, it's got to be a for-real 383 or 440 Super Bee or GTX!!  I saw a '68 Shelby that someone had desecrated with a Mod Motor and a six-speed!! You couldn't buy one of the 300,000+ 289 models sold that year-it had to be a rare, Shelby GT350!!  That's what I'm saying. If you want to put an LS Motor in a '69 LeMans or a '70 Cutlass-go ahead. No one gives a shit. But don't do it to a numbers-matching Judge, or a W30 442!!  Put a Coyote into a '69 Mustang if you want-just don't use a Boss 302, or a 428 CJ Mach 1!!  Put a 6.4 SRT8 Hemi into a 318 powered '71 Charger if you want. Just don't use a 440 / Six Pack Super Bee!!!  ( For one year only-1971-the Super Bee was based on the Charger instead of the Coronet. 6,000 or so were built. )  So-are we clear on my position now? Take a fuel-injected 302 and the 5-speed out of a '92 "5.0" and stuff it into one of the 559,000 '66 Mustangs built. As long as it's not a Shelby GT350H!!  Anyhow-I just wanted to vent that. Mastermind  

More fun one or two year wonders....

Here's some more one or two year wonders that might be fun to play with. # 1. 1978-79 Dodge Li'l Red Express Pickup. These were a short-bed 2WD stepside pickup with a red and gold paint job, chrome wheels, and vertical chrome semi-style exhaust stacks. They also had an E58 Police Interceptor 360 V8 a 727 Torqueflite and a 3.55:1 rear axle. Mopar freaks like to reference a November 1977 Car and Driver article titled "Double the Double Nickel" where they tested a bunch of cars that could run faster than 110 mph. The Li'l Red Express Prototype blew the doors off an L82 / 4-speed Corvette and a W72 Trans-Am in a drag race. However-the "Prototype" had NASCAR style W-2 heads, a single-plane aluminum Holley "Street Dominator" intake topped by a 650 Double-Pumper Holley, the cam out of the old high-performance 340, and catalyst-free exhausts. Needless to say-Production examples that had standard 318 / 360 heads, and iron intake with EGR and a Carter Thermo-Quad, and a stock cam, were substantially slower!!  They have kind of a "cult" following which drives the prices up a bit, but they are a unique ride.  # 2. 1977 Pontiac Can-Am. Trying to cash in on the Trans-Am's immense popularity the engineers came up with this performance / appearance / handling package for the LeMans. They had a white paint job with "Judge" style stripes, a "ducktail" rear spoiler, a T/A style "Shaker" hood scoop and body-colored Rally II wheels. They also had "Radial Tuned Suspension," a 400 Pontiac V8 ( 403 Olds in California ) backed by a TH400 with a shift kit and a posi rear end. They only lasted one season because GM down-sized all the intermediates for '78. A cool ride if you can find one. # 3. 1982 Corvette. For this one year only you got the C3 bodystyle that had been around since 1968, with the "Cross-Fire" Injected 350 / TH700R4 powertrain that would be in the new for '84 C4 'Vette. "Corvette" and "cheap" don't usually come in the same sentence, but 'Vette collectors snub these in favor of the carburated L48 and L81 and L82 models used through '81.  # 4. 1984 Corvette. This was the first year of the C4 body that would last until 1996. Power was the Cross-Fire Injected 350 backed by a TH700R4 or the 4+3 4-speed manual with overdrive in the top 3 gears. 'Vette collectors snub these in favor of the Tuned Port Injected '85-91 models, so you can buy them cheap. I have seen decent examples on used car lots as low as $2995!!  # 5. 1984-86 Ford Mustang SVO. These had 16" wheels and 50 series tires, a scooped hood, front and rear spoilers, 4-wheel disc brakes, and Recaro seats. Power was a turbocharged 4-banger that made between 175 and 205 hp depending on year. They didn't sell well when new because the "5.0" V8 models were both faster and several thousand dollars cheaper. Dynamite if you can find one. # 6. 1990-93 Chevy SS454. These were a 1/2 ton 2WD pickup with chrome wheels, a sinister monochromatic black paint job and a 454 V8 under the hood. 1990 models had a TH400 and 3.73:1 gears. '91-93 models had a beefed-up 700R4 and 4.10:1 gears. Great for winning burnout contests. # 7. 1992-95 Ford Lightning. Another hot-rod pickup. This one had 17" wheels, a hotted-up 351W V8 and front and rear sway bars. Any of these would make a fun driver / weekend toy. Mastermind      

One or two year wonders that can be fun...

For whatever reason-poor sales, lousy promotion, rising gas prices, whatever- some cool stuff never lasted. But if you run across one now, they might be fun to play with. # 1. 1970-71 Pontiac Tempest T-37, 1972 LeMans GT. Often called  "The Poor Man's GTO".  These were a strippy Tempest coupe with a 350 V8 and a 3-speed stick. However a 4-speed or a TH400 and the 400 and 455 V8s were available. For some odd reason-in 1972 the name was changed to "LeMans GT", but the package was basically the same.  # 2. 1972-73 Mercury Montego GT. Based on the Ford Gran Torino chassis David Pearson won a bunch of NASCAR races for the Wood Brothers in the mid-70's in one of these sleek fastback coupes. Most will have 351C power which certainly isn't a bad thing; 429 models will be pricier. Dynamite if you can find one. # 3. 1973-75 Pontiac Grand Am. Touted to have the performance of a Trans-Am and the luxury of a Gran Prix-Pontiac's attempt at building a BMW didn't quite take off. Performance buyers bought T/A's and luxury buyers bought GPs. However-they were and still are a great performance and handling platform. Based on the LeMans chassis they had wrist-thick front and rear sway bars, ( "Radial Tuned Suspension " ) front disc brakes, and 400 or 455 cubes for power. You could even get a 4-speed with the 400. 34,000 were sold in 1973 alone so their not a moon rock, and any suspension or brake upgrades that fit a Chevelle or LeMans will fit these. # 4. 1974 Pontiac GTO. Often called "The best Nova ever built". This was the year that Pontiac took the GTO name off the "A" body LeMans platform and put it on the "X" body-( read Nova ) platform. They had front and rear sway bars, a T/A style "Shaker" hood scoop and a 350 V8 backed by a 4-speed or a TH350. A 400 or 455 is a bolt-in swap. 7,058 were built. # 5. 1975 Plymouth Road Runner. For this one year only the Road Runner name was put on the Sport Fury platform. 318 models are slugs, but the 360 and 400 versions can be made to run. Over 6,000 were built. # 6. 1971-72 "Heavy Chevy". These were a Malibu coupe with a blacked-out grille, domed "SS" style hood, slotted 14" Rally wheels and special "Heavy Chevy" emblems. Most had 350 power, but the 396 / 402 was available. Rat versions will be pricier. 6,727 were built in '71 and another 3,000 or so in the strike-shortened '72 model year.  # 7. 1983 Camaro Z/28 / Pontiac Trans-Am. For this one year only you could get a "Cross-Fire Injected" 305 with a 4-speed TH700R4. With a 3.06:1 low gear and a 3.23:1 axle ratio these scoot surprisingly good. And the "Cross-Fire Injection" will feed a healthy 350 or 383 with a little tweaking. F-body collectors snub these in favor of the carburated L69 / 5-speed models or the '85-91 LB9 "Tuned Port Injection" models, so they can be bought cheap. # 8. 1980 Z/28 Camaro. For this one year only you could get a 350 V8 with "Cowl-Induction" a vacuum operated hood scoop,a T10 4-speed with a 3.44 1st gear and a 2.28 2nd, with a 3.08:1 posi rear. This combo had better acceleration and more top-speed than the '77-79 models 2.64 low tranny and 3.73 rear cog. Automatics got a TH350 and 3.42:1 gears. Dynamite if you can find one.  For some odd reason in '81 the 350 was only available with a slushbox. ( You could still get the 350 / 4-speed combo in Canada ) If you wanted a 4-speed you got a 305 that wheezed out 145 hp. You could have some fun with these without breaking the bank. Mastermind    

"Lukewarm" August Nights....

"Hot August Nights" is here again, and once again I'm disappointed. It seems to get worse every year. Apparently our greedy city fathers here in Reno-Sparks have finally killed the Golden Goose. I fully understand from a tourist's point of view. Last week any motel room in Reno-Sparks whether it was Motel 6 or Holiday Inn or Circus-Circus or the Peppermill was priced anywhere from $29 to $59. This week the greedy bastards are charging $150-$300 per night. That's just wrong, and short-sighted. So you screw people for an exorbitant rate for a few nights. Does that really improve your bottom line for the year? Does that make people want to come back?  And law enforcement here has always been a joke during HAN. The highway patrol is out on interstate 80 just beyond the state line writing tickets as people come in. The minimum fine now for 1-10 mph over is $195!! In other words your driving or towing your classic car to Hot August Nights, the speed limit is 70 and because your going 75-we greet you with a $200 ticket!!  Which you can pay, or you can spend even more money coming back up here a month from now to go to court and fight it. Neither option is going to leave a good taste in anybody's mouth, or make them want to come back. And is a few days of terrorizing tourists with big tickets for minor violations going to fill the city coffers that much? So much that it's worth people not coming back?  There's always a riot, because the police dept allows gang-bangers from the Bay Area and Sacramento to come up here and cause trouble. If New Orleans P.D. can handle Mardi Gras, why can't we handle HAN? There's homeless drunks panhandling all up and down the strip. You don't see that on the Las Vegas strip!!  And again- there's no events worth going to. In years past we got great entertainment like The Righteous Brothers, ( or Bill Medley by himself after Bobby Hatfield passed away ) Jerry Lee Lewis, The Beach Boys, John Kay of Steppenwolf, Little Richard, The Guess Who, Paul Revere and the Raiders, Gary Puckett and the Union Gap, Fats Domino and Ringo Starr,-you know people who actually had hits in the '50's, '60's and '70's!!  I realize some of them have passed away or retired, but now we don't get ANYBODY. Not even "Rain" or "Rob Hanna" or Johhny Baron. Local guys that had very popular tribute shows to the Beatles and Rod Stewart and Elvis Presley respectively.  They used to have real 1/4 mile drag races at the old Stead airport. No more. Now they have 1/8 or 1/16 of a mile drag races in casino parking lots!!  Really?  Who wants to see cars race for 330 or 660 feet? To 25 or 50 mph??!!!  Puhleeze!!  The really strong big block cars will spin the tires for 330 feet!!!  The old "Top Gun" dragstrip in Fallon is still open and that's only 57 miles from Reno. The Reno-Fernley racetrack is only 29 miles away and has a full dragstrip!!  Have some real drag races and offer some real prize money. But the casino owners and organizers of HAN are too damnded cheap. They'd have to buy insurance and have paramedics standing by if you had real races. We don't want to pay for that!!  I guess that's why the high-rollers with the really cool cars are staying away. The "Show-n-Shines" aren't worth going to. The GM section is all 55-57 Chevys and Camaros and Chevelles, and GTOs and Firebirds. No 427 'Vettes, no old small-block '50's or '60's 'Vettes for that matter, no 409 Impalas, no 421 Catalinas, no Buick Rivieras or GS Skylarks, no Olds 442s or Toronados, no W31 or Rallye 350 Cutlasses, no 396 Novas, no Yenko Cars, no Baldwin-Motion cars. I did see one DKM "Macho T/A". No Cadillac Convertibles.  Very few '50's and '60's Chevy / GMC trucks, very few El Caminos. The Ford section is all Mustangs. Generic Mustangs. No Boss 429s, no Boss 302s, no GT350 or GT500 Shelbys. No Cougar Eliminators-very few Cougars period, no Torinos, no Cyclones, no Marauders, no Thunderbolt Fairlanes. A few T-Birds here and there.  The Mopar section is all B and E bodies. Chargers, Road Runners and Challengers with a few 'Cudas here and there.  No Superbirds or Charger Daytonas, no Max Wedge cars, no A990 Hemi Belvederes, no Hemi Darts. No Super Bees. Hell, I'd jump for joy if I saw a 340 Duster or Demon!!  No "Christine" clones, no '70's Furys done up like cop cars. It's a damn shame because just a few years ago you'd see all that cool stuff driving around town. Now you don't even see them on trailers, because their owners aren't bringing them!!  Why should you spend thousands of dollars to go somewhere and get gouged on a hotel room, get chickenshit tickets, and see lousy entertainment??  I wouldn't. The city fathers and HAN organizers better make some changes quick or it's going to die altogether. Sad. Mastermind      

Just because it's in a movie or on T.V....doesn't mean it can be done...

A lot of people argue about car stunts they see in movies and on T.V.  Like Kurt Russel's evil stuntman Mike said in "Death Proof" even before the advent of CGI there was quite a bit of trickery going on behind the scenes by filmmakers to put exciting sequences on screen. Way back in the '50s-when Robert Mitchum did "Thunder Road"-the rear bumper of his '50 Ford was unbolted and barely attatched with adhesive-so when the "Feds" latched on to it-it would come off easily. They also used hydraulic jacks to flip the cars. "Bullitt"-the grandaddy of them all that still looks good 50 years later because of Steve McQueen's committment to reality had quite a bit of off-screen scrambling to keep it going. Ford had the contract to supply cars to the movie company. McQueen didn't want two Fords in the chase. What are the chances that the cop and the bad guys would both be driving Fords?  Since Chrysler wouldn't or couldn't supply them with cars because of Ford's contract-McQueen and Stunt Coordinator Carey Loftin bought the ominous black Charger off the showroom floor of Tanforan Dodge with their own money. The Charger was a 440 / 4-speed; the Mustangs were all 390 / 4-speeds. Ford guys aren't going to like the next few paragraphs, but it's all true verified by interviews with Steve McQueen, Carey Loftin, Bill Hickman, and Max Balchowsky-the stunt crew of the film. When they first started filming-the Charger would leave the Mustang so badly that they couldn't film it. Steve McQueen was furious.  Max Balchowski-Loftin's ace mechanic hopped up the 'Stang. He added headers and shorty glasspack mufflers, and an Edelbrock Intake and a Douple-Pumper Holley carb along with a Mallory distributor. That's why the car sounds so badass when McQueen is winding the gears. The Charger would still beat it in a drag race-but now only by a car length or two; now McQueen could stay close enough to Hickman so they could film it! The other problem they had was bounding over the hills of San Francisco at speeds up to 115 mph. The Charger-with it's Torsion bar front end and leaf-sprung Dana 60 rear end had no problems other than throwing hubcaps off. If you watch the film closely-the Charger loses 8 hubcaps during the chase!  The Mustang on the other hand kept breaking suspension parts and ripping the shock towers out. Ford had supplied 5 Mustangs. Loftin and Balchowski worked every night stealing parts off the other cars to keep the camera car running! That's why only two of the five are known to exist today. Oddly-none of the Mustangs had a limited-slip rear end. That's why McQueen and Loftin-they drove the Mustang- ( Bill Hickman was the Charger driver ) created such one-tire fires when taking off.  Carey Loftin was also the stunt coordinator on the classic "Vanishing Point". The Challengers were stock except for the one that Loftin jumped the creek in. That one he cranked up the torsion bars to maximum height and added Koni shocks. At the end he towed an engineless Camaro with dynamite and an impact-sensitive switch in the engine bay behind the Challenger toward the bulldozers at 80 mph and used a quick-release cable. In the "Seven-Ups" directed by Philip D'Antoni-who worked on "Bullitt"-he apparently didn't care what cars were used-or perhaps didn't have Steve McQueen's power with the film company-there were two Pontiacs in the chase-a black Grand Ville and a silver Ventura. ( Pontiac's version of the Nova ). The chase was supposedly through upstate New York-but there were a lot of similarities to "Bullitt" including the passenger shooting at the pursuing cop with a shotgun. The scene where the Ventura's hood comes off after getting shot took quite a bit of planning. By the '70's all cars had double hood latches. Even if the hood was popped accidentally or not fully closed-the 2nd latch would keep the hood from flying up and blocking the driver's vision. A safety feature all the manufacturers had. The stunt crew cut off the 2nd latch; that way when the hood was popped-it would fly up. However-it would have just been up; the hinges and the bolts holding it to the hinges would have held. The stunt crew set the hood on the hinges with pins not bolts. That way when the hood flew up at 75 mph or however fast they were going-the pins would slip out and the whole hood would fly off.  It looks cool on-screen. The scene where the Ventura runs under the parked semi took a page from Loftin's playbook. In the film it looks like driver Roy Scheider dove onto the floor a second before the car's roof is torn off.  In reality-no one was driving the Ventura. Bill Hickman was towing it beside him using Loftin's quick-release apparatus-that's how they threw the Charger into the gas station in "Bullitt" as well. Hickman hit the release at the last second and the Ventura spectacularly gets be-headed by the rear of a parked semi. In the first "Smokey and the Bandit" big burnouts were easy. With 400 cubes under the hood the T/A's could smoke the tires at will. However-the 2nd movie was made in 1980-and the mighty 400 Pontiacs were retired. The ill-fated Turbocharged 301s couldn't smoke the tires at all on dry pavement. Burt Reynolds and Hal Needham-the director / stunt coordinator thought it would look silly to have to wet the pavement for smoky burnouts, and that the audience would find it cheesy, which it would have been. The solution? They had ten black Turbo T/A's for filming. Two of them were designated "Burnout" cars. These two were fitted with nitrous. When they wanted tire smoke either Burt Reynolds or the stunt driver would powerbrake the motor, hit the nitrous button and release the brake. Instant burnout. The joys of the smog-laden cars of the early '80's. Just 3 years earlier in '77-the driver only had to pop the clutch on a 4-speed models or just punch the automatics!  The Dukes of Hazzard destroyed something like 216 '68-70 Chargers during it's run. A lot of the "jumps" were done with driverless cars because the stunt guys knew that a driver would be gravely injured or killed by the impact. The stunt crew of "Dukes" had a rivalry with the stunt crew of "Knight Rider". A grudge match was set up. The Dukes stunt crew built a "General Lee"-it was code-named "GL26"-it was the 26th one built, with a tricked-out suspension and a NASTY 440. The Knight Rider crew put a NASTY Traco-Built 460 hp 350 Chevy into one of their '83 T/A's in place of the stock 305. '83 T/As had WS6 suspension and 4-wheel disc brakes from the factory-nothing needed there. Since the T/A in the show was named "KITT"-this one was code-named "Superkitt".  Anyhow the race was held at a local L.A. racetrack-it might have been Fontana-I'll have to double-check-and apparently it was too close to call. No one claimed victory; but they had a lot of fun. A funny side effect-for months to come the stunt drivers of both shows complained loudly that all the other cars didn't have near the power and handling capabilities of GL 26 or "Superkitt"!!  The "Fast&Furious" movies use quite a bit of trickery. Hydraulic jacks were used to make the Charger wheelie in the race with the Supra. The stunt crew put 600 lbs of lead in the rear bumper of the Chevelle to make it wheelie. The Grand National had the body mounted backwards on the frame for the scene where Vin Diesel is chasing the semi in "reverse". The BMW in the "Transporter" was a one-off 733i specially built for the movie by BMW. It had a manual transmission-which production models don't have-their all automatics-and it had all the traction controls and electronic nannys disabled so the stunt drivers could do all those smoky burnouts and sliding around. On that subject-this is why so many action flicks use old musclecars in chase scenes. Because modern cars have so many safety features and electronic nannies-if you hit anything at any rate of speed-the fuel pumps shut off, the airbags trigger, etc-which could certainly ruin a chase scene if it happened at the wrong time!  Anyhow-take what you see on the screen with a grain of salt-and like they used to say on stunt shows-"Don't try this at home". Mastermind          

More on "Butchered" projects...

A lot of people hold the opinion that a classic car that is modified in any way is "Butchered". I disagree. Gearheads have always played with cars and modified them in the never-ending quest for more speed. I saw a great article in a magazine. A guy bought a '57 Chevy. The 2nd owner had made it a race car in 1962, running a 389 Pontiac with a blower, backed by a B&M prepped Hydro-matic. It has the typical '60's "gasser" look-which I love-radiused rear fenders, straight front axle, big-n-little tires.  The car was raced up until the 1990s, always with Pontiac Power. It currently has a 400 Pontiac / TH400 combo. Refreshingly-the current owner said he was going to fix a few things and paint it,and keep running it at the drags, with the Pontiac powertrain!! He was even hunting down a Pontiac Blower setup!  Now that's preserving a piece of hot rodding history, rather spending a gazillion dollars restoring to "Just as it left the factory" status. I salute the guy and wish him luck with his very cool "barn find".  I saw two very badass Chevys at a recent show-n-shine of a local Chevy club. One was a 1965 Corvette. It had radiused and flared fenders covering huge tires on Halibrand mags, the front bumper had been removed,it had chrome sidepipes and it was powered by a nasty 396 that had dual-quads. I loved it. It was totally badass in a very '70s way, yet still looked and sounded cool today. Of course some asshole had to comment on how sad it was that someone "butchered" a classic 'Vette. By flaring the fenders and removing the front bumper?  Puhleeze. I talked to the owner-he said he bought the car in 1984-from the second owner who bought it in 1972. Like I thought-the cool mods were done in the early '70's, and thank god over the years the subsequent owners didn't feel the need to "Make it Right"-i.e.-return it to stock. The other one was a '68 Camaro. It had fat tires on Minilite wheels,flared fenders,front and rear spoilers,a domed fiberglass hood with a 427 'Vette style power bulge, and loud exhaust that exited in front of the rear wheels,giving it a very Trans-Am racer look. It was powered by a nasty 327 backed by a Muncie 4-speed. A nice little touch-it had a 750 Double-Pumper Holley on an Edelbrock "Scorpion" single-plane manifold,and the owner had painted the little cast Scorpion emblem red. It looked cool. It had finned "Mickey Thompson" valve covers-very 70's period correct-and the water pump, the alternator and brackets, and the radiator support were all chrome. The hoses all had the stainless steel braid covering that was popular in the early '80's. It was a very slick-looking car, with the power to back up the image. It reminded me of the Camaro driven by Paul LeMat-( The '32 Ford driver in "American Graffiti ) in "Aloha, Bobby and Rose". Of course some "Just as it left the factory" type had to turn up his nose at it. I don't get that. If you bought a new Mustang G/T or Challenger R/T today-would you leave it totally stock for the next ten years? You might, but chances are better that you would add a K&N air filter, a Flowmaster "Cat-Back" exhaust, a Hurst shifter and maybe some aftermarket wheels. More hardcore types might invest in a computer chip, a cam, some higher per hr flow injectors or even a blower. And 30 years from now-some asshole will gripe how you messed up the car!!  I'm kind of a middle-ground guy on this issue. Yes I think the guy who took a pristine, for-real fuel-injected, '63 Split-Window Corvette, and "Pro-Streeted" it-I mean gutted the interior, put a roll cage in, put 33 inch slicks with wheel tubs on it, and installed a tunnel-rammed 454 back by a powerglide with a trans-brake,ought to be dragged out into the street and shot, and his house burned to the ground. On the other hand an SS396 Chevelle is not "ruined" because it has 17 inch radial tires on aftermarket wheels, halogen headlights, and an HEI Distributor!! See what I'm saying?  A Ford I saw was pretty cool. It was a '63 Falcon. I know-"Ford Falcon" and "Cool" are rarely used in the same sentence, but this one was. It had a Mustang II front clip which gave it rack&pinion steering and front disc brakes. It had a roller-cammed 302 backed by a 5-speed-obviously pirated from an '80's or '90's Mustang. The interior was cool with aftermarket gauges, and Recaro-style seats and a leather-wrapped Grant steering wheel. It was really fast, and looked cool. I know I gripe about modern fuelie swaps all the time-but this wasn't a numbers-matching Boss 302, it was a '63 Falcon!!  Who gives a shit what you do to a '63 Falcon?  Anyway-have a little tolerance-just because a car has some modification that you wouldn't do-doesn't automatically make it a piece of crap!!  Mastermind    

Sometimes something "Butchered" can be a deal....

I talk to a lot of people who pass up screaming deals on great stuff because in their opinion the car is "butchered"-i.e. doesn't have the original engine, or has bodywork or modifications that they don't like. On one hand I agree that anyone who even thinks of cutting up the trunk of a Hemi 'Cuda for wheel tubs, or putting a Coyote into a Shelby GT350H, or an LS engine into a '63 Split-Window Stingray ought to be drawn and quartered and have his entrails cut out and burned. Absolutely. But 99% of these cars I hear about and see are not nearly that offensive. In fact-sometimes the "offenses" are so mild I'm scratching my head and thinking-"Your griping about that??"  Really?  Here's some examples. # 1. 1964 LeMans. I thought this car was way cool. It had a sinister black paint job, American Racing Torq-Thrust mags and radiused rear wheelwells to clear big tires. It also had a snarling 425 Olds V8 backed by a TH400 with a transbrake. The guy had timeslips showing that the car ran 11.30's. In my opinion a cool, badass hot rod. The guy that was considering buying it turned up his nose because of the Olds engine and  the radiused rear 1/4s. Puhleeze. I told him-1st off-"It's a LeMans, not a GTO." "So it's modified." "It's totally badass and runs 11.30s!! I'd buy it and drive it the way it is!! "However-"If you want to make it a GTO clone or just convert it back to Pontiac power-it's pretty easy." "Buick-Olds-Pontiac engines have the same bellhousing bolt pattern, so you don't even need a new trans." All you have to do is find a Pontiac-any Pontiac in a junkyard that has a 400 or 455 under the hood and get everything." "By everything I mean the alternator and power steering brakcets, belt pulleys, etc." "It wouldn't be that hard to do." "I Like the radiused rear wheelwells." "Very period correct, gasser style looking." "But if you hate them-Year One and a zillion other companies sell '64 LeMans / GTO 1/4 panels." Not that hard to remedy." "And the price is dirt-cheap". "If that car had a 421 Pontiac in it, you and all the other people who have passed on it would be fighting with machetes to give him double what he's asking." "Recognize a steal when you see it." Nope. He passed it up, and paid way more for a 326 / ST300 powered '66 model that wasn't as nice because it was "original".  #2. 1965 Cutlass. Same deal-a '65 Cutlass with a straight, rust-free body, and a 454 Chevy backed by a Muncie 4-speed. The car was awesome, and quick. Again-it was an F85 / Cutlass post coupe-not a 442. I'd have drove it the way it was. I told the prospective buyer-"If you really want to convert it back to Olds Power-all you'll need is a Lakewood BOP bellhousing, and a flywheel for a 455 Olds." "Again-go to a junkyard and it doesn't have to be a Cutlass or 442-any big Olds 88 or 98 or Vista Cruiser wagon-get the 455 and all the brackets and accessories.". "You can sell the 454 Chevy and make some money back too."  Nope. No deal. # 3. 1987 Buick Grand National. This guy really needed his ass kicked for passing up this car. It was a for-real GN, with a pumped up Turbocharged 4.5 liter motor. The previous owner had spent a ton of money-and located a 252 inch Buick V6 block. He had Kenne-Bell bore and stroke it, and it was 270 inches. Quite a step up from the stock 231. It had a bigger turbo, ported and polished and o-ringed heads, a special wastegate, a Jacobs ignition that was adjustable from inside the car, a Kenne-Bell prepped TH200R4, and it had radiused and flared rear fenders to clear 275/60R15 drag radials, and Lakewood coil spring traction bars. It ran 10.60s in the 1/4. If Darth Vader or Satan drove a car, this would be it!! If I'd had the money at the time, I'd have bought it!! I even tried to get a quickie home-equity loan to buy it, but it didn't work out.  Did the ass-clown buy it? No!! He paid MORE for a stock one because it wasn't "Butchered".  UGH!!  # 4. 1979 Indy 500 Pace Car Mustang. This one was cool. It was originally a 4-banger model. The seller had bought this one not running. He then took the 205 hp Turbo engine, 5-speed tranny, disc-braked 8.8 rear end, 16" wheels and tires, and Recaro seats out of his totalled '86 SVO Turbo Mustang and put them in the '79 body!!  He drove it for a year or two, and when he got married and had kids decided to sell it and get an SUV. But the car was awesome-it had the cool Pace Car Paint Job and graphics, and the badass SVO powertrain. The propective buyer turned up his nose because it wasn't "original". I was incredulous. "Who in the hell wants an "Original" '79 Mustang??!!" "They were dogs!!" "You'd rather have a normally aspirated 2.3 liter 4-banger that wheezes out 85 hp, or a 2bbl 302 that wheezes out 120 backed by that crappy wide-ratio manual 3-speed with an overdrive that Ford gratuitously called a 4-speed or a C4 slushbox-I mean that's the two powertrain options for '79 Pace Cars-instead of the state of the art 205 hp, high-winding SVO / Close-ratio 5-speed setup." "Yes."  Like Ron White says-"You can't fix stupid."  # 5. 1974 Camaro. This car had Minilite wheels on it, and a rip-snorting 396 Rat Motor. It had a two-tone paint job like the Baldwin-Motion cars, although it wasn't a Motion car. It was however, a great looking Camaro that really ripped. It would smoke the tires as long as you wanted to stay on the throttle. The prospective buyer pooh-poohed it because it had an aftermarket flip-up sunroof.  I'm not kidding. That was the major objection. These stupid little flip up sunroofs were immensely popular in the '70's and '80's. I don't particularly like them either-but their are a lot of '70's and '80s Camaros, Chevelles, Firebirds, Mustangs and Dusters, etc that have them, unfortunately. You could live with it, if it doesn't leak-or check with a reputable body shop about patching the roof-if you really love the car otherwise and it's cheap enough. Anyhow-I didn't see any of these previous owner mods as irreversible or a deal-breaker but these other people did. You have to decide for yourself on the individual car. But think hard before you blythely dismiss something that may be deal of the century because of one little thing.  Mastermind                    

Sometimes you just have to trust people...And your gut...

I've had some people agonizing over whether or not to buy really nice cars because they can't fully document them. If your buying a Ford you can send in the vin number and get a Marti Report that will tell you everything. If your buying a Pontiac-you can contact Pontiac Historical Services and get a copy of the original window sticker. Other stuff can be harder to chase down. For example for the entire time they existed-1964-87-El Camino sales weren't tracked separately. They were lumped in with Chevelle / Malibu sales. So if your trying to document an LS6 El Camino SS-or an LS5, or L34 or L35 for that matter-it's going to be hard if the seller doesn't have a build sheet or window sticker. And who does on a 50 year old car that's had 10 or more owners?  You'll just have look at the car carefully. And sometimes hi-performance models were options on the base car. In 1964 the GTO package and the 442 package were options on the LeMans / Tempest and Cutlass / F85.  From 1965 to 1971 the GTO and 442 were separate models. In 1972 they reverted to option status. So if the vin number says your 1972 GTO / 442 is a LeMans / Cutlass-don't panic. Chances are the car's not a "fake". For example-the Z/28 package has always been an option on the Camaro-even in the glory days-1967-72. The Super Bee package was an option on the Coronet, except for 1971-when they based it on the Charger. However-the Road Runner was always a separate model from 1968-72. Most premium GM models built from 1967 on have front disc brakes. I say most-I had a '68 SS396 El Camino that had 4-wheel drum brakes. But for the most part SS Chevelles, GTOs,442s, etc-will have front disc brakes.  Not so with Mopar stuff. I have seen 440 GTX's and Chargers and Road Runners and Super Bees with 4-wheel drum brakes. I saw a 440 / Six-Pack Super Bee once that had drum brakes, and was original and documented. Now who ordered a 4,000 lb car with a 390 hp engine, and didn't get power disc brakes??  There's other little tells to look for. For example-if your considering a 340 Duster-remember the 340 package included an 8 3/4 rear end-an upgrade from the slant-six / 318 models 8 1/4 rear. If it's an automatic 340 models got a 727 Torqueflite; six-cylinder and 318 models got a 904. With GM stuff for the most part big-block cars got TH400s, small-block cars got TH350s. For the most part. However I know for a fact that 350HO Firebirds and LeMans models had TH400s. Corvettes from 1968-72 even 327 and 350 base models got TH400s. Conversely-1975 and later Formula Firebirds and Trans-Ams-even 400 models got TH350s. Partly because the engines weren't as powerful as the older models, but mostly for Catalytic Converter clearance!!  As for GM manuals-except for Z/28 Camaros and W31 Cutlasses-which had M21 or M22 Muncies-small-block cars usually had Saginaw 4-speeds. A lot of the big-block cars 396 Chevelles, 400 GTOs and Firebirds, 400 442s-had M20 Muncie 4-speeds which was considered a wide-ratio and had a 2.52:1 low gear. The M21 and M22 were close-ratios and had a 2.20:1 low gear, and for the most part were used behind Ram Air III and IV Pontiacs,as well as 455HOs, W30 Oldsmobiles, and L78 396s and 427 and 454 Chevys. And a posi was an extra-cost option on most models. My best friend in high school had a 1970 SS396 Chevelle. It was an L34-350 hp model. It had front disc brakes and the cowl induction hood and rally stripes. Yet it had no console, no tachometer and a 3.31:1 open rear end. It did great one-tire burnouts!!  You have to remember that back in the '60's and '70's you could order almost anything you wanted on any model. Their rare-but I have seen Gran Prix's and Monte Carlos with 4-speeds from the factory. Bucket seats were optional on most models. So it's very likely that you will find a 383 Road Runner or 396 Chevelle with bench seats and a column shifter!! ( If it's an automatic ). While there's a lot of strippy Mustangs out there-most Cougars from 1967-73 are going to have cool options like front disc brakes, upgraded interiors, factory A/C, and larger engines. Most non-Mach 1 Mustangs have 289 / 302 motivation. Almost every Cougar I've ever seen has 351W, 351C, or even 390 motivation. The point I'm making is do some research and have common sense. A lifelong Pontiac enthusiast-I've had a guy try to sell me a '70 "Trans-Am" that had a wood dash and no tach and a 350 V8. All 1970 and later T/A's had the brushed aluminum dash panel and full instrumentation-and the standard engine was always 400 cubes, except for '71-73 which all had 455s. This was obvioulsy a base-model or Formula 350 Firebird that he'd put T/A body trim on!!  The same thing-another guy tried to sell me a '68 "GTO" convertible that had a 350 and a 2-speed ST300 trans. Obviously it was a gussied up LeMans. 1968 GTOs all had 400 cubes standard, and if they were automatics, they were TH400s!!  So be careful, and sometimes you have to trust that the seller is on the level.  Mastermind    

More classic flicks that didn't get sequels...or shouldn't have

Part of the problem with doing follow-ups to cult classics goes back to the writer's vision. Back in the '70's everything was existential, and you had to be punished for your misdeeds. How could they do a sequel to "Vanishing Point" when Kowalski went out in a blaze of glory at the end?  Ditto for "Dirty Mary, Crazy Larry". The death crash with the train was used in the opening credits of "The Fall Guy"-the hit series with Lee Majors as a stuntman / bounty hunter for years. I wish they'd have went a different direction. What if Vic Morrow's obsessed sheriff caught them and sent them to prison?  Mary could have lied and said they kidnapped and raped her and walked away scot-free. She could have even took the money from the robbery and hidden it.  After a few years in jail Larry and his mechanic could either escape or get paroled. And now they'll seek out Mary to get their money back. She can be living the good life-maybe even have a husband and a kid. And now her past has caught up with her. She can beg for her husband and kids safety and offer to get them the money. Like in the first one-"Mary"-the smokin' hot Susan George-could have spent a lot of the movie scantily clad, and since they don't trust her maybe even drugged and / or bound and gagged. She has to find a way to get away from them or kill them, because she's pretty sure once they get the money they'll kill her. Vic Morrow's obsessed sheriff could be on their trail again-out of his jurisdiction. Maybe Mary even contacted him in the hopes that he'll save her. That would have been a great crime / revenge thriller-except they killed everybody at the end of the first one!  Another one that had room for a sequel if they hadn't killed the sheriff at the end was the "California Kid". If you've seen the movie Martin Sheen's character had a poignant, almost romance with Michelle Phillips who was a lonely waitress working in the town's only diner and living in a trailer behind it. What if she decided to go with him when he left town? He could still outrun the Sheriff on the deadly road. But instead of the sheriff crashing to his death he could put out an apb saying that the "Kid" kidnapped the waitress against her will. The maniacal sheriff-played with glee by Vic Morrow again-could lead the pursuit across state lines. Plenty of opportunity for car chases and "Getaway" style action as Sheen and Phillips try to prove their guilty of nothing but driving too fast. That would have been cool. Or how about "Thunder Road?"  Robert Mitchum's character went out in a blaze of glory-are you seeing a recurring theme here? But his younger brother who he was trying to keep out of the moonshine business could take over. That would have worked. Of course there's others that they definitely shouldn't have tried or thankfully didn't. They tried to do a 3rd "Bandit" movie without Burt Reynolds. It was awful, and it flopped. I thought the "Dukes of Hazzard" movie sucked. The TV show was definitely done tongue-in-cheek, but it was cute. John Schneider and Tom Wopat had good chemistry as good ol' boys living on the edge, Catherine Bach was smokin' hot as cousin Daisy and Denver Pyle was cool as uncle Jesse-a semi-retired moonshiner. The now deceased Sorrell Booke was hilarious as the scheming Boss Hogg, and James Best was likable as the Barney Fife like sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane. And like Kurt Russel's evil stuntman Mike said in Death Proof-the stunts were real, no CGI. They totalled something like 216 '68-70 Chargers during the series run. The casting in the movie was awful. Stifler as Bo Duke??!!!  I can't help it, poor Sean William Scott will always be the horn-dog dipshit with the sexy whory mom from the "American Pie" movies. Johnny Knoxville as Luke?  Again-all I see is "Jackass". Jessica Simpson worked out hard for months to get her body bikini-ready-but her phony southern accent was like fingernails on a blackboard, and her wooden acting made Donna Douglas on the Beverly Hillbillies look like an Oscar winner. Burt Reynolds must have really been in tax trouble to lower himself to play Boss Hogg, and ditto for Willie Nelson doing uncle Jesse-who tee-hee-smokes weed. I can't remember the plot. Thank god it didn't gross enough for the greedy studio to want to do another one. The worst one though was "Drive". This starred Ryan Gosling as a mechanic / race car driver / getaway driver. What was maddening to me is his wooden acting was so bad-he showed no emotion whatsoever. Charles Bronson looks like Tom Hanks compared to this guy. And it's never explained why he wants to be a criminal and risk prison and death when it appears he makes a decent living as a mechanic / auto racer. Even the action sucked. Any others I missed?  Mastermind    

There's a reason some car flicks don't have sequels, or the ones that do fail....

Some people were asking me why some classic action / car chase movies didn't have sequels. ( Some did, but they suck ). One reason is sometimes the actors and producers aren't interested. "Bullitt" the grandaddy of them all that's still thrilling 50 years later was a huge hit. I loved the catch-phrase from the poster. "There are good cops and there are bad cops." "And then there's Bullitt". For whatever reason, Steve McQueen wasn't interested in continuing the adventures of Frank Bullitt, or doing another similar character.  A lot of people don't know it-but Clint Eastwood wasn't the 1st choice for "Dirty Harry".  John Wayne was, and he turned it down, and regretted it when it became a huge hit. It was then offered to Frank Sinatra who turned it down and to Steve McQueen-who said it was "Frank Bullitt" with a different name and he didn't want to do two cop pictures back to back. Eastwood was cast and the rest is history. Seeing the monumental success of "Dirty Harry" John Wayne decided to take a break from westerns and do a couple of modern police thrillers.  Wayne made an excellent "Dirty Harry" type movie in 1974-"McQ"-he played a Seattle detective and he drove a Brewster Green 73 Trans-Am in it. However it came out about the same time "Magnum Force" the "Harry" sequel did-and they had similar plots-dirty cops after the hero. "Magnum Force" was a smash; "McQ" got critical acclaim but didn't do much at the box office, which was why there wasn't a follow-up. Everyone loved "White Lightning". Burt Reynolds was never cooler than Robert "Gator" McLuskey who negotiates his way out of prison to seek revenge on the corrupt sheriff who killed his younger brother. The dialogue was crisp, the action exciting-and Jennifer Billingsley just oozed sex as "Shake-a-Puddin"-spending the entire movie barefoot in tight mini-sundress, her dark brown roots showing in her bleach-blond hair, while she drove Burt and the audience wild. She totally nailed the southern slut that men die and kill for. Others have tried it-Kim Basinger in "No Mercy", Teri Hatcher in "Heavens Prisoners" and most recently Reese Witherspoon in "Mud". Those were noble efforts, but none could top Billingsley for raw sensuality. Gator does kill the sheriff-the Feds take him and Billingsley away at his funeral. People say there should have been a sequel. There was, and it was awful. Made in 1976 Burt Reynolds starred and directed. It was his first time directing, and I think he couldn't decide if he wanted to make a badass revenge flick like the first one, or a dipshit comedy.  Jerry Reed did alright as a sawed-off shotgun toting redneck crime lord. However there were too many characters and subplots. Gator has a teenage daughter?  Where did that come from? In the first movie there's no mention of an ex-wife or kids. And him and the daughter live in a swamp with his dad? In the first movie his dad wasn't speaking to him because Gator was turning "liquor people" in to the Feds. And what happened to the family farm and his mother? There's no mention of her dying or the farm being foreclosed on!!  Gator's handler is an incompetent fat slob named Irving Greenfield who I guess is supposed to be funny, and there's a crazy cat lady that gets involved. The love interest is Lauren Hutton who's acting career peaked years earlier when she spent a lot of time naked in "Little Fauss" and Big Halsey". Since Reynolds was 40 and she was 33 when the movie was made-her "plucky girl reporter" / Nancy Drew act is just annoying, as is their "meet cute" and ill-fated romance. While Burt and Jennifer Bilingsley seemed to have actual heat between them-him and Hutton had no chemistry at all. And it's never explained why "Gator" and "Bama" McCall-Jerry Reed's character have such mutual respect for each other even though their on opposite sides of the law. Did they go to high school together? Serve in the army together? Do time in the same prison?  Their relationship is never explained, so I can't be that invested in it. I usually like Burt Reynolds, but this one's just a mess. Burt had a megamash the following year-"Smokey and the Bandit" out-grossed everything but "Star Wars" in 1977. It was funny, had good car-chase action and sold about a million T/A's for Pontiac in the ensuing years. In 1980 they tried a sequel, and it was awful. If you remember at the end of "Smokey and the Bandit" Big Enos Burdette bets them double or nothing that they can't make a run to Boston for some Clam Chowder. They should have stuck with that, and with Jackie Gleason's maniacal lawman chasing them. Instead they get off on some weird plot about transporting a pregnant elephant, and surprise-Jackie Gleason is a triplet- and his two brothers are cops too! It was just awful with none of the charm of the original. I honestly don't think I laughed once. Another one was one of Quentin Tarantino's favorites-"The Driver" starring Ryan O; Neal as a getaway driver and Bruce Dern as a cop obsessed with catching him. I loved the movie for 90 minutes and then hated the end-O'Neal is chasing a '76 T/A in a '76 Chevy Pickup!!  If the truck was a 454 it might have been a match in a drag race-but around corners?  The T/A would leave it in 3 blocks. And Ironically-earlier in the film-O'Neal was driving a '77 Firebird!!  Why wasn't he chasing the T/A in that?  That would have been believable. Anyhow O'Neal gets away clean and Dern goes to jail. The movie made money, and certainly a follow-up with Dern out of jail and out for vengenace would have been good. I don't know why-maybe O'Neal and Dern weren't interested-but there was never a sequel.  "Drive Angry" was a surprise hit in 2011. Nicolas Cage gives a wonderfully over-the-top performance as a "badass motherfucker" who escaped from hell to save his granddaughter from a Satanic cult. The baddies can't kill him, because he's already dead! Amber Heard is smokin' hot as a woman he hooks ups with-she also has a sinister black 440 powered '69 Charger. William Fitchner is hilarious as the Devil's Bounty Hunter who's trying to bring Cage back to hell. The mayhem is non-stop, and Amber agrees to care for his granddaughter and Cage willingly goes back to hell with Fitchner in an awesome '57 Chevy. Plenty of room for a sequel, and a lot of people have asked. It made a pile of money-so I don't know why the original producers or someone hasn't stepped up. I know Cage desperately needs a hit-he's been doing straight-to-video stuff lately, Amber Heard hasn't done anything noteworthy except divorce Johnny Depp and briefly date Tesla CEO Elon Musk. Come on guys-we'd much rather see "Drive Angry 2"  Than "Fast&Furious" 12 or wherever they are!!  Mastermind

Avoid "Basket Cases" like the plague...

I talk to a lot of people that buy cars they think are a deal, and realize too late that their just money pits. Often they end up selling the car unfinished, at big financial loss. I don't care what it is-nothing is worth restoring from a basket case. Nothing. Because if it's a Hemi 'Cuda or a Boss 302 missing the Hemi or "Boss" engine and other major parts it's a bottomless money pit. 1st off-where are you going to find a Correct, complete, 1969 or 1970 vintage Boss 302 engine for sale, at any price? Chances are you won't. You could build  your own "Boss" using Edelbrock or Trick Flow heads and intake, but that's still not correct is it?  The same for the Hemi-where are you going to find a complete, running or at least rebuildable 426 Hemi engine with 1970 or 71 date codes, for sale, at any price? You could buy a Mopar Performance crate Hemi-but that's still not correct and numbers-matching is it?  Even if by some miracle you located a correct engine and all the other parts you needed to finish the car-I guarantee by the time it's done your dollar investment will be MORE than what you would have had to spend on a complete, correct already restored car!!  I've told this story before but it's worth re-visiting. A guy I know wanted a '70's Firebird for a hot rod. He looked at one that was $500. It was a straight body but that's it. I mean this was an engineless, transmissionless, radiatorless, gas tankless, interiorless hulk. We looked at another one that was $2,500. The body was straight, the paint was oxidized and it needed the front seats recovered, and the vinyl top needed to be removed or replaced. But it started right up,had good oil pressure, didn't smoke,ran good, the transmission shifted smoothly, the brakes were good, the suspension seemed tight. I told him to buy it. He starts talking about the $500 one being a better deal. UGH! "No, this one is the better deal". I said. I pointed out that by the time he chased down an engine and tranny, gas tank and radiator, brackets and hoses, and all the interior parts and trim pieces necessary to get the other one in drivable, registerable condition-which this one already was-he'd have a lot more than $2,500 invested. He came to his senses and agreed that even though the price was 5 times more than the other one, it was the better deal. All he'd need to make the car really nice is some paint and upholstery work, and if he wanted more power-there's tons of speed equipment available for a Pontiac V8. He was going to be way ahead of the game by just starting with a better car. This is not an isolated example. Another guy wanted a "Bullitt / Dukes of Hazzard" 68-70 Charger. He bought an engineless, transmissionless one for $600. He towed it home and when he put it up on a lift-he discovered it had major rust damage-it not only needed new fenders and 1/4 panels and a trunk floor-the floorboards in the interior were practically gone. The guy from the body shop said-it would be so costly to fix that he'd be better off just getting another car. He did find another car-with a running 383, a straight body and good interior, that only needed a trunk floor for $4,000. I told him to buy it. Again-even though the price was nearly 7 times higher-it was a much better deal. Beware of cars missing things besides the engine and tranny. Say you find a not-running 409 Impala or a '64 GTO for a screaming price. The owner says he'll "throw in" a date correct engine. Great! except this "engine" turns out to be a block and heads. An engine is much more than block and heads. Where are you going to find the alternator brackets,power steering pump brackets,belt pulleys, oil pan,timing cover, valve covers,water pump,distributor, fuel pump,exhaust manfolds, intake manifold, etc-for a 1964 409 Chevy or 389 Pontiac? Yes, all that stuff is available through the aftermarket, but you'll have to chase it down or mail-order it or order it online, and it adds up-expenses you didn't plan on. I know a guy who bought a '63 Gran Prix. He didn't like the "Slim Jim" hydro matic trans. They won't shift above about half-throttle. And no one makes a shift kit or valve body for them. He decides to "drop" in a TH400. He can even use the stock shifter in the console-it has the same number of detents-he just has to remember that reverse is now low. Except now he's perplexed-there's no place to mount the starter! Huh? That's right- Pontiacs up until 1963 had the starter mounted on the bellhousing. 1964 and later models had the starter mounted on the engine block! Since the TH400 was introduced in 1965-the bellhousing had no place to mount the starter. Luckily for him-1963 blocks had the pad machined on the block to mount the starter in anticipation of the changeover. All he had to do was have the pad drilled and tapped, and he could use the '64 and later starter, and modern TH400 trans. However-if the car had been a '62 or older model-he'd have been really screwed-the older blocks don't have the machined pad. He'd either have to keep the crappy trans, or get a later model engine to be compatible with the modern trans. The point I'm making is go ahead and restore anything you want-but there has to be something there to restore!  A couple of good examples-a guy bought a '77 T/A that was missing the T-Top panels. He had a hell of a time chasing those down. Because some '76-77 models had Hurst T-Tops, and some '77-78 models had Fisher T-Tops, and their different. And there's no list of VIN numbers or production dates or anything to help you narrow it down. He finally did find some that fit, but it was a bitch and took literally months of searching. Another guy wanted to restore a '64 Cadillac Convertible like Phillip Micheal Thomas drove on "Miami Vice". Except the top was missing. Not just the canvas-all of it-the frame, the folding pieces that hold it up, the electric motor. He had a hell of a time chasing that stuff down. Like I said in an earlier post-if it was a '68 Chevelle-no problem. But a '64 Caddy-sorry Charlie. Just remember that anything missing major components is not a "deal". I know a guy that was restoring a '68 Ford F100 stepside. They may be available now-I don't know-but back in the '80's he could not find replacement rear fenders anywhere, new or used. He finally bought Chevy stepside fenders and re-worked them and welded them to the Ford bed. It actually looked really good-better I think than the stock Ford fenders-but it was a TON of work. Like I said in the previous post be careful to not bite off more than you can chew. Mastermind          

Don't bite off more than you can chew....

I talk to so many people who say they got a great "deal" on some car that they have grand plans for. Usually a year or two later, their totally disillusioned and disgusted and end up selling the car for less than what they paid for it or less than they have invested. There's two reasons for this. One is they picked the wrong kind of car. How can you pick the wrong kind of car?  For example-you can get anything you want for a '55-57 Chevy, up to and including a brand new whole body, authorized by GM. That's great if your restoring a '55 Chevy. But what if you have a '57 Pontiac Bonneville or a '55 Olds 88? Where are you going to find a 1/4 panel or a grille and front bumper for those?  If your restoring a Chevelle, GTO or 442, or a Camaro, Firebird or Mustang you can get anything you need. Dynacorn is selling all-new Mustang and Camaro bodies authorized by GM and Ford. But what if your restoring a '62 Pontiac Gran Prix? Or a '66 Riviera or a '69 T-Bird? Do you know that no one makes a replacement grille for a 1972 Gran Torino? So if you have one, or a same-year Ranchero-( Ford's version of the El Camino that was based on the Torino platform from 1968-76 ) with a broken grille, your shit out of luck-no matter how much money your willing to spend-because no one makes the parts!!  Where are you going to get a replacement rear glass for a '71-73 "Boat Tail" Riviera? The same goes for Mopars. If your restoring a '68-70 Charger or Road Runner or a '70-74 Challenger / Barracuda you can get pretty much anything you want-body parts, suspension and brake parts,interior trim pieces etc. But where are you going to find that big rear glass for a '65 Barracuda? Or a fender or 1/4 panel for a '64 Dodge 330?  What if you want to do a "Christine" tribute or the cop car from the "California Kid?" Where are you going to find anything for a '58 Fury? Or for that matter a '70 Sport Fury or a '75 Road Runner? ( The Road Runner was based on the Sport Fury platform for one year only, 1975 ). What about bigger "niche" cars that are still cool? Where are you going to find a rear door skin for a '61 Continental convertible with the "suicide" doors? Or a grille? Headlight doors for a '66 Toronado or a '67 Eldorado? A 1/4 panel for a '63 "Bullet Bird" Thunderbird?  God help you if your doing an AMC Javelin or Rebel Machine. So if your thinking of buying a car for a project-that's not a Camaro or Mustang or Chevelle, etc.-do some research and check parts availability. A trunk lid for a '70 Mustang is a no-brainer. A '72 Mercury Montego GT-that's some more "unobtanium". Not available at any price. The second mistake people make is they take on projects that are beyond their mechanical ability. If your a bodyman by trade, then something with minor or even major body damage may not faze you at all. You might whistle while you work. Someone who is not a bodyman would be better off passing up that car and just spending more money and getting a better car to start with. Ditto for running gear. If your a professional mechanic-something with a blown engine, or even missing the engine and tranny may not be a big deal to you. You may have say-a 403 Olds V8 and a TH350 that you took out of a wrecked Trans-Am on your garage floor that will bolt right into that engineless '71 Cutlass you just bought. But for "Joe Average" who has never replaced an engine or done any heavy-duty repairs-again it might behoove him to pass on this "deal" and get a running car. And choose running cars wisely. A '77 Firebird Formula with a 350 Pontiac and a 4-speed and T-Tops is a great find. 350 Pontiacs respond well to basic hot-rod tricks-headers, cam, carb and intake. You can make 325-350 hp and 400 lbs of torque pretty easy with bolt-on parts. Beyond that-you'll need a 400 or 455-which is a bolt-in swap. By contrast a '77 Firebird with a 301 V8 is not a good deal no matter how cheap the price is. The reason is the 301 was a lightweight "economy" motor, and except for the tin and the motor mounts, virtually nothing interchanges with the "traditional"-i.e.-326-455 Pontiac engines. Further-there is zero aftermarket parts available for the 301. None. Zero. Now I know people are going to say "Hey just "Drop" in a 400." It's true that a 400 will bolt in place of a 301, but where are you going to find one that hasn't been snapped up by GTO and Firebird restorers?  The last 400 Pontiac rolled off the assembly line in November 1977. That's 41 years ago. ( L78 400's were stockpiled for '78-79 T/A's and Formulas ). Not many people are going to have an engine that's been out of production for 41 years "laying" around. I've said it before, but I'll say it again. If you have or want to buy say a '71 Charger or a '73 'Cuda with a 318, and want to infuse it with big power, then I suggest getting a 360 Magnum out of a '90's Dodge truck or Jeep Grand Cherokee. Edelbrock makes intakes so you can run a carburator. Or if your a little more bucks up-get a Mopar Performance 360 crate motor-they have 390 hp and 445 lbs of torque. But don't think you'll just "Drop" in a 440. 1st off-they've been out of production since 1978-40 years. Secondly-you'd need a big-block front crossmember, you'd need a new transmission-a 904 Torqueflite won't bolt up to or stand up to a 440, so you'll need a 727, you'll need big-block torsion bars so it'll handle properly, a big-block radiator, and if the engine is warmed over you'll probably need a 8 3/4 or Dana 60 rear end. In the long run-you'd be better off just warming up the 318-carb and intake, headers, mild cam. Or swapping in the 360. If you "Gotta Have" a big-block E-body or B-body-then bite the bullet and pay the price for one that has a 383, 400 or 440 from the factory. You'll save yourself a ton of money and grief. Fords are worse. Don't get me wrong-I'm not slamming Fords-I'm just stating an irrefutable fact. Fords have nowhere near the easy parts interchangeability that GM and some Chrysler stuff has. A 390 in a Mustang has a different oil pan,different water pump, different fuel pump,different alternator and power steering pump brackets,different exhaust manifolds and different motor mounts than a 390 in a F100 pickup, and their both different from a 390 in a T-Bird, which is different from a 390 in an LTD!!  A 289 / 302 has a different bellhousing bolt pattern than a 351C. A 390 has a different bellhousing bolt-pattern than a 429 / 460. So no easy engine or tranny swapping. A lot different than buying a TH350 or TH400 out of a Buick and putting it behind any Buick, Olds, Pontiac, or Cadillac V8 from 326 to 500 cubes!!  Or buying a Chevy TH350 or 400 and bolting it place behind anything from a 283 to a 454!!  If no one tells you this stuff-then you don't know. And with later-model stuff-'80's and '90's cars have way more electronic controls and crap on them than '60's and '70's cars had. So if you want an '80's IROC-Z with a 5-speed-keep looking until you find one. Don't buy an automatic and try to convert it to stick. If you want a "5.0" Mustang-there's millions of them out there-don't buy a 4-banger or V6 model and try to swap in a V8. You'll just committ hari-kari in your driveway before you get it done. I'm not trying to piss on anybody's dreams-I'm just saying be honest about your own mechanical capabilities and careful which projects you choose. It'll save you a ton of money and grief in the long run. Mastermind      

A rare turd is still a turd...

Robert Prosky said it in the movie "Christine". "You can't polish a turd". My friend that owned an import / specialty / performance auto parts store had a similar saying-"A rare turd is still just a turd." Of course they were making fun of people who were investing a ton of time and money in cars that would never be worth their effort or dollar investment. Like the '58 Fury in the movie or a Morris Minor. I see a trend on a lot of the classic car for sale websites. A lot of them are featuring ultra-low mileage "survivors"-i.e.-cars that are unrestored, but have been kept in a garage for 40 years, and their asking insane prices for them. I don't know if any of these actually sell for the insane prices, but I laugh at some of them. One was a 1979 Trans-Am with 65 miles on it. That's right 65. Asking price was $150,000. For a 403 Olds / TH350 model!!!  To put this in perspective-Trans-Am specialties of Florida had a 400, 4-speed, WS6, 10th Anniversary model with 25,000 original miles and new paint that they were asking $49,000 for. They had a 400,4-speed red and black '79 model with a killer motor-Edelbrock heads and intake, a Comp Cams cam, Hooker headers, MSD ignition-for $29,999, and for the same price a restored, documented by Dennis Mecham, '78 "Macho T/A" that had a killer 455 in it. They had a numbers-matching frame-off restored, 4-speed, RAIII 1970 model for $59,000, and a 455HO / 4-speed Lucerne Blue '71 model with 33,000 miles on it for $79,000. If you "gotta have" a badass T/A-any of those other cars are much better choices for half or even 1/5 of the money their asking for the "survivor".  Do they really think someone is going pay 150K for a 403 / TH350 model? Let's be real and expand beyond T/A's.   I've seen numbers-matching Hemi Road Runners and LS6 Chevelles going for less than that!! I've seen Boss 302, Boss 351 and Shelby Mustangs selling for less than that!! I've seen Tri-Power, 4-speed, 427 Stingrays selling for less than that. For half that!!  Another had an '86 IROC-Z Camaro with 30,000 miles on it, that they wanted $30,000 for!!. And it was an LG4 model!!! You know the carburated 305 that wheezed out 150 hp!!  Not even the 190 hp L69, or the 215 hp LB9, or the 240 hp L98 350!!!  And even if it had one of those other engines it's still not worth 30 grand!!  Guys I know are still buying '80's and early '90's Camaros and Firebirds dirt-cheap. I have seen rough, but running examples as low as $1,200-and anything over 3 grand is usually pretty nice. But 30K??  To put this in perspective-RK motors in South Carolina is advertising a restored, big-block, '74 Corvette Convertible for $35,000!! Their also showcasing a 350 / 4-speed, 1981 Corvette with 47,000 original miles for $24,000, A 19,000 mile Buick Grand National for $35,000 and a numbers-matching 302, 4-speed, '68 Z/28 for $49,000!!!  But you should pay 30K for an LG4 305 '86 Camaro!!!  Puhleeeze!  Some other offensive ones-some guy was advertising a 350 powered '72 Cutlass for $45,000. Not even a 442, a base-model Cutlass, with bench seats and a column-shifted TH350. By contrast- RK motors has a numbers-matching, frame-off restored 400 / TH400 1969 442 CONVERTIBLE with front disc brakes,power steering, power windows, tilt-wheel, and factory A/C for $62,000. For the same price they have a restored, numbers-matching 1968 4-speed, SS396 Chevelle, and a restored 400 / TH400 '67 GTO Convertible with factory A/C and the Hurst Dual / Gate shifter. Trans-Am specialties has a restored, numbers-matching, triple black loaded-and I mean loaded-the hood tach, power seats, power windows,factory a/c, posi rear end, 400 / TH400 powertrain, 1969 Gran Prix for $25,000!!  But you should pay 45K for this nothing Cutlass coupe? I've seen it in my hometown. A guy was heartbroken because he got no offers on his pristine '68 Chevelle. A bench seat, post coupe, drum braked, strippy 307 model!!  That he was asking $30,000 for!! It was a clean Chevelle body-and would make someone a nice project-but not with a 30K start price!! I know another guy who just sold his '72 Chevelle for 25K-but it was a 454 SS model!!  Another guy was crushed that no one was interested in his strippy automatic, 2bbl 262 V8 powered '76 Camaro. For $12,000. When a local classic car dealer has a pristine, 350 / 4-speed, T-Topped, Cowl Induction equipped 1980 Z/28 for $14,900!!!  See what I'm saying?  I've said it before-"rare" doesn't automatically mean "valuable". Who wants a 305 powered 1980 Corvette? Or a 301 powered '79 Trans-Am? Or a 255 V8 powered '81 Mustang?  My personal, all-time favorite for sheer Chutzpah was the guy whose ad said you could live out your "Kowalski" Vanishing Point fantasies. It was a 1970 Challenger he was selling, but it had 4-wheel drum brakes, no power steering, an automatic, and it was powered by a 225 inch Slant-Six!!!  A far cry from a 440 / 4-speed R/T model, don't you think??  Anyhow-two-barrel step-down engines, column-shifted bucket seat cars, bench seat 4-speed cars, two-speed automatics, 3-speed sticks,heater and radio delete cars aren't valuable-their just weird. Like the guy who was asking something like a $125K for a 1970 Trans-Am becuase it was "one of one". Apparently the only TH400 T/A Pontiac ever built with no console and a column shifter. That's right-this wasn't one of the 88 RAIV models ever built, or one of the 252 '73 SD-455s,or the ONE 455, 4-speed '76 model that Pontiac put a '77 front clip on for promotional purposes, that caused Burt Reynolds and Hal Needham to want a black T/A for "Smokey and the Bandit". No-this one has a crappy, ugly column shifter!! And that's why it's worth more than a condominium!!  Not!! as Wayne and Garth used to say on SNL. So buyer beware-and remember my friend's quote-"A rare turd is still a turd."  Mastermind                  

A badass, cool,low-budget "Junkyard Jewel.....

A guy I know showed he me a toy he's been working on all spring the other day. I was impressed because it's definitely "Old School" and definitely cool, and he doesn't have $3,500 in the whole project!!  He bought a '69 Buick Skylark 2 door from his neighbor for $500. The body was straight and in good shape, but the interior needed work and the 350 was very tired, running on 6 or 7 cylinders and smoking badly. Another friend of his sold him a '75 Pontiac Gran Prix for $1200. The G/P had a body that didn't really have a straight piece of metal on it, but it had a 455 that would smoke the tires at will and a good-shifting TH400. He took the 455 / TH400 powertrain and dropped it in the Buick using the G/P motor mounts. He also used the G/P rear crossmember and trans mount, having to drill a couple holes in the frame. He spent a little at a driveline shop getting the G/P driveshaft shortened and re-balanced. ( Although their both technically "A" bodies, Skylarks have a 112 inch wheelbase and G/P's have a 118 inch wheelbase ). This was and easy and cheap procedure. He took the G/P's front spindles and added the 11" front disc brakes, calipers, master cylinder and booster, which greatly improved the stopping power over the Skylark's 9.5 inch 4-wheel drums! He also transplanted the G/P's wrist-thick front and rear stabilizer bars to the Buick as well as the G/P's steering box and P/S Pump. The Buick had power steering-but it was a 17.5:1 ratio box. The G/P's "Radial Tuned Suspension" box had a 14:1 ratio-which greatly quickened steering response. He added KYB gas shocks as well. A set of Hedman "Shorty" headers and dual exhaust went on as well as an Edelbrock Torker II intake he had laying around topped with a 750 Edelbrock carb. He had the 6X heads milled .060 at a machine shop to raise the compression one full point and new valvesprings installed. He also added a matching Edelbrock Torker cam.  A TransGo shift kit was added as well. The car is awesome. It handles like a '70's Trans-Am, and runs like a '60s GTO!!  It will literally spin it's tires as long as you want to stay on the throttle. He's got about $3,500 in it now. He plans to paint it, and add some 17" wheels and modern ZR rated tires to further improve handling. When he's done, he'll have maybe 6 grand in the whole thing, and it's totally badass. I'd put it up against a new Hemi Charger or a Mustang G/T in a drag race or the twisties any day of the week. Some people will gripe that it's a "Hybrid"-that it doesn't have a Buick powertrain-but the fact remains that it's a cool car that was built for almost nothing. This is the kind of projects my friends and I did all the time back in the '70's and '80's.  Anyhow I thought it was cool, and wanted to share it. Mastermind

There's more choices than ever for engine builders....If your not stuck on date codes!!

I talked to a guy the other day who was trying to build a Z/28 clone. He had secured a nice, solid, '69 Camaro and most of the trim pieces-emblems, spoilers, etc he had gotten from year one. He was griping that he couldn't find a "DZ" code 302 block, and he was having trouble finding an M21 or M22 Muncie 4-speed with 1968 or 69 date codes. You think?  My 1st suggestion since the car is a clone anyway-was to buy a GMPP 425 hp 383 crate engine and back it with a Tremec 5-speed. My 2nd suggestion-if he's just "Gotta Have" a 302 / 4-speed combo was get a 350 block and put a 3.00 inch stroke rotating assembly in it. GMPP, Eagle and other companies sell them. Now you've got 302 inches. I also suggested buying a Richmond Super T10 from Summitt. The 2.64 or 2.88 low-geared model would be much better for acceleration with a 302 than the M21 / M22's 2.20:1 low.  He says-wait for it-"But that's not correct." It's a clone-the whole freaking car isn't correct!!  I understand trying to build something to get the look and feel of your dream car without spending 100k. But honestly when he's winding his car through the gears-is he going to be thinking-"This is awesome, but it'd be so much better if the block had the proper numbers and this tranny was a Muncie instead of a T10."  Puhleeeze. Anyhow-the point I'm trying to make is you can build just about anything with the help of the afrermarket. Dart is offering brand-new 400 inch small-block Chevy blocks. You want to build a 427 Chevy Rat Motor? Get a 454 block out of an old truck and GMPP or Eagle can hook you up with a 3.76 inch stroke rotating assembly. And a new flywheel and balancer of course. ( 454s are externally balanced, 427s are internally balanced ). Want a 421 Pontiac? Eagle and Butler or Kaufmann Performance can hook you up with a 4 inch crank assembly to make your 389 / 400 into a 421. Edelbrock and Trick Flow have aluminum "Cleveland" style heads and intakes that bolt up to Windsor blocks so you can build your own "Boss" 302 or "Boss" 351. With stroker cranks, you could build a "Boss" 347 or a "Boss" 392 or 427!!  How badass would that be?  The point is the stuff is out there to build virtually anything. So stop griping and build that killer motor you've been dreaming of.  Mastermind  

Build the biggest engine that you can afford...The key word being AFFORD!

The buff magazines are constantly featuring mega-inch monster motors, and the manufacturers are in the game as well. GMPP will sell you a 572 inch Rat motor, Mopar Performance will sell you a 528 inch Hemi or a 505 inch wedge, and Ford SVT will sell you a 514 incher. They all have over 600 hp and they all cost 15-20 grand. If you can afford that and want or think you need that much power-by all means buy one. But the reality is a lot of us can't put 20 grand in the whole car-much less just the engine. And a lot of people don't want or need some killer motor-they just want a little more power than stock. I'm going to give some good advice here on how to get the most bang for your buck. The buff magazines always say "Build the biggest engine you can afford". This is generally good advice, with heavy emphasis on the "afford" part. But different engine lines have different characteristics and what applies to one line may be totally wrong for another. Here's a perfect example. If your building a small-block Chevy-a 350 costs no more to buy or build than a 305, yet makes substantially more power and torque. That's a no-brainer. Anyone would say go with the 350. Further-if the engine needs a new crank or pistons-stroker kits are so cheap for small-block Chevys-I've seen 383 crank, rod and piston kits with rings,bearings and the oil pump for as low as $399!!. It would certainly behoove you to build the 383, which is going to have more oomph than the 350. Now let's say you have a 400 Pontiac. The buff magazines all tell you to put a stroker rotating assembly in it and make a 455. ( Or a 461 / 467 if the block is bored .030 or .060 over ). However stroker rotating assemblys for Pontiacs start at $1799!!  For $1800 you could buy a complete cam kit-cam,lifters, springs, timing chain, rockers, pushrods etc-from Comp Cams or Crane or Lunati, an Edelbrock carb and intake, a set of headers, and still have a little left over for rings, bearings and oil pump and maybe minor machine work-i.e.-turning the crank .010 under, re-sizing the rods etc. If the short block was in good shape-you could build your whole engine for that. The 400 in my brothers GTO cost $1900 to build and dyno'd at 381 hp and 430 lbs of torque. Not bad for a junkyard engine with a few bolt-on parts. To make a 400 a 455-you'd have that much in the rotating assembly-and you still have to buy all the other parts you'd need. You'd end up having 4 grand in the motor instead of 2. And it wouldn't make THAT much more power. One of the buff magazines built a 455 that cost "only" $4,400. They were happy that it made 440 hp and 460 lbs of torque. Guess what? If my brother wants another 59 hp and 30 lbs ft of torque-I think we can get it for a lot less than another $2,500!! A 400 can run just as hard as a 455 with the right equipment. The same goes for making a 383 / 400 Mopar into a 451. It requires all kinds of custom machine work,-including relieving the block for clearance- and the parts are expensive. I'd just stick with the 400 cubes and spend the money on heads, cam, carb and intake, ignition, etc. Where your going to get the most gain per dollar. Here's another scenario where like the Pontiac-less is more. Let's say your Mopar project has a 318. The easiest way to big power is swap in a 340 or 360. However, 340s were only built from 1968-73,and are pretty scarce and usually expensive. 360s were used in zillions of Dodge, Plymouth and Chrysler cars and trucks and vans from 1971-1991. And there are millions of "Magnum" engines in junkyards in Dodge trucks and vans and Jeep Chrokees from 1992-2004. I'd get a 360 Magnum. The Magnum heads breathe better than any factory head and many aftermarket ones. Edelbrock offers "Magnum" compatible intakes. And the Magnum heads and intake will bolt up to older "LA" blocks. The small-block Mopar is an awesome base for a hi-performance engine. The hot setup for Small-block Chevy racers is 6-inch rods. ( Stock is 5.7 ). A 360 Mopar has 6.123 inch rods from the factory. Now Eagle and other companies sell rotating assemblys to turn a 360 into a 408. I've even seen Blueprint Engines and others selling 408 Mopar crate engines. One made 375 hp; the other made 415. Big Deal. Mopar Performance's 360 crate motor made 380 hp!!  And cost a lot less. You can get 400 hp out of a 360 Magnum pretty easy with the right parts. In my opinion, stroking it isn't worth the extra expense. Now here's another scenario where the shoe is on the other foot. If you have a 350 Olds and want some more "bang" for your buck, I'd get a 403. Everything interchanges with a 350. Although they were only used from 1976-79 they were used in every GM "Big" car-Catalinas, Bonnevilles, Olds 88s and 98s, Buick Rivieras, and Electras and all the wagons, as well as Pontiac Trans-Ams and Formula Firebirds. There are millions of them out there. And 53 extra cubes will certainly help, all other things being equal. Edelbrock claims 397 hp and 400 lbs of torque from their "Performer RPM" package on a 350. 53 more cubes would put you well over the 400 hp mark. Magazine writers spout numbers flippantly; 400 honest hp will make any street car an absolute rocket. Another "Rodney Dangerfield" ( "No respect" ) is the 400C / M Ford used in millions of cars and trucks from 1971-82. The reason they got a rep as "dogs" was they were saddled with 2bbl carburation, single exhaust, a lazy cam, and were put in heavy cars with salt-flats gearing like 2.75:1.  Their "Cleveland" style heads breathe exceptionally well. Give him a decent cam, headers and a 4bbl carb and intake, and swap the gears for something in the 3.23-3.73:1 range and you'll swear it's a 460. Every year in the engine masters challenge someone has a 400 Ford with over 500 hp. If you have or want to buy a car with this engine-you don't need to swap in a 460-just give this one it's vitamins!  So do some research before you start spending your hard-earned money on the latest "it" fad. Just because something is possible doesn't mean it's good. Mastermind