Quirky musclecars in movies.....

Everyone's pretty much sick of  '68-70 Chargers, disco-era T/A's, Shelby Mustang clones, etc. I know because someone asked me about cool action flicks or mainstream dramas that had musclecars other than those whether there was a chase scene or not. I aim to please, so here's a list of cool flicks with cool cars featured. # 1. "Drive Angry". This over-the-top action / black comedy flick featuring Nicholas Cage as a-( in the words of the narrator ) "BAMF" who escaped from hell to rescue his granddaughter from a Satanic Cult, and the narrator-who is Satan's Bounty Hunter and has to bring him back. The bad guys can't kill Cage, because he's already dead. Anyhow-plenty of action-and I know he and Amber Heard drive a '69 Charger for a while-but he has a '64 Riviera early on, and later gets a '72 SS454 Chevelle, and the bounty hunter has a wicked '57 Chevy. Great, mindless fun. # 2. "Jack Reacher." If your a fan of the books-this one made you sick-in the books-Jack Reacher is 6'5" and 270 lbs. And they cast Tom Cruise? Who's what 5'8" and a buck-fifty? Puhleeze. There is a chase scene with Cruise driving a 1970 SS396 Chevelle chasing an Audi A6, while numerous cop cars chase him. If you haven't read the books, you'll like it. If you've read the books, you'll want to vomit day-glo. ( Kind of like when they cast 5' 5"  Boston-born and raised Mark Wahlberg as Stephen Hunter's 6' 2" Arkansas-born Marine sniper "Bob Lee Swagger", but that's another disgusting Hollywood gaffe for another time.)  # 3. "Roadhouse" Classic action flick with Patrick Swayze and Sam Elliott as legendary bouncers cleaning up a badass Missouri bar and running afoul of the local crime lord. Great action-Kickboxing Champion Benny Urquidez trained Swayze for this movie, and he looks natural in the fight scenes. When he throws that double-left hook while kicking the thug- "O ' Connor's " ass-it's pure poetry. And his brawl with Marshall Teague is legendary. Anyway he drives 2- '63 Rivieras in this movie-to avoid getting his 380SL Mercedes trashed. Watch the movie-it's a running joke, just like "I thought you'd be bigger." And the smokin' hot Kelly Lynch gets naked. Did I mention that?  # 4. "Code of Silence". Chuck Norris thriller that was originally written for Clint Eastwood-( which is why it had a great story; better than Norris's usual chop-socky crap ). Anyhow-Chuck kicks a lot of ass and drives a '75 Firebird Formula 400 that gets wrecked chasing the bad guys in a Cadillac. # 5. "Impulse". This under-rated thriller was directed by Clint Eastwood's ex Sondra Locke-and she showed she really had chops. I'm surprised she hasn't gotten other directing gigs. Theresa Russell stars as an undercover Vice Cop on the edge. Her job is hanging by a thread-( too many excessive force complaints ) and her credit cards are maxed and she's broke. One night while posing as a Hooker she takes a rich guy up on his offer of $10,000 to have sex with him. Except he's a major drug dealer, and he gets murdered while she's in the bathroom. She takes the money and runs, and then gets assigned the case. Both the bad guys and the cops soon figure out there's a missing witness. With the baddies and IAD closing in, she tries to cover her ass. Great suspense and a great running gunfight that ends in a cramped little convenience store-where barefoot and out of ammo-she takes out two thugs with some "Jailhouse Rock"-an up and down the body martial-arts system that came out of the prison system. ( It's good for fighting in tight spaces like jail cells,-duh- where you can't leap around like a ballerina; Mel Gibson used it in the original "Lethal Weapon" against Gary Busey in their big brawl ). Anyhow she drives a bright blue 1986 IROC-Z Camaro. # 6. "The Dark Half." The killer-"George Stark" drives a jet-black '67 Toronado with a bumper sticker that says "A High Toned Son of a Bitch."  #7. "The Punisher" This train-wreck really pissed me off. It starred Thomas Jane as a cop who has his whole family murdered by gangsters and is left for dead. He goes vigilante to hunt down the bastards and kill them. It starts off good enough-the late Roy Scheider plays his father and he and Jane take out a bunch of baddies in a great gunfight before their over-run. When he gets out of the hospital-he stockpiles weapons and builds and armored, badass '69 GTO. Then it goes completely off the rails. It spends way too much time on Jane's quirky neighbors-a fat guy, a tattoed and pierced little greaseball and the totally wasted Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model-turned actress Rebecca Romjin-they don't have sex or even date,and we don't even get a gratiuitous barefoot-in-a-bikini scene by the pool. Now that's a crime. The GTO gets wrecked but not even in a decent chase. A country singing hitman drive's a '70 Super Bee-but that's wasted too-no chase or anything. A total mess that will irritate you, even if you only paid 99 cents to rent it off Redbox. # 8. "Knight and Day." Tom Cruise spy vehicle that's NOT a "Mission: Impossible". He drugs Cameron Diaz frequently so she won't witness him killing anybody or committing other mayhem-that keeps her innocent as the body count rises, right? I personally think the director has a fetish for women fainting. If your into that sort of thing-you get several scenes of her rolling her eyes and passing out, and then waking up disoriented. And you do get a gratiutious bikini scene. Overall it's a mess with a stupid plot and implauible scenarios. Cameron does drive a nice Tri-Power, 4-speed, '66 GTO-the only redeeming quality of the film. And the old couple who classic car restorer Diaz is shipping classic Pontiac Parts to, who may or may not be Cruise's parents-your never definitively told-have a '67 Gran Prix convertible. Like I said, a mess. If I think of others I'll put them in another post....Mastermind                      

A perfect example of "What Not to Do".....

Had a guy come through the shop the other day with a nice 1970 El Camino. It had a leaky radiator hose,which was an easy fix. He said he was trying to sell it and wasn't getting many offers even though he didn't think he had it overpriced. It wasn't overpriced; it was just done wrong. It had an nice black paint job on a straight body, and the dash wasn't cracked and the seats were obviously recently redone in stock-type upholstery. However-someone-he said the previous owner-had installed a digital instrument panel. It also had 22" inch wheels on it which made it look cartoonish-a small car sitting atop these huge wheels. The 350 sounded good and seemed to have plenty of power-but it was an L31 Vortec crate engine. It did have an Edelbrock carb sitting on a Vortec Performer manifold-at least it wasn't fuel-injected. Those three things made it sale-proof. I've said many times that I'm not, and I despise the "Just as it left the factory" crowd. I mean is a 45 year old car really "ruined" because it has radial tires and halogen headlight bulbs? No it isn't. But on the other hand the modifications need to be period-correct. Now this Elky would have looked a lot better with 15" or 16" inch American Racing Torq-Thrusts or Cragar S/S mags, and some performance tires. It would have been better off with a stock instrument panel, and I would have been fine if had a Sun Tach attatched to the steering column. Even if the engine wasn't numbers-matching it would have been better if was a pre-1987 model-you know the "Original" 1955-86 small-block, like say a "Targetmaster" GM replacement, or just something a guy built with parts he had laying around-like an old Torker or Tarantula manifold with a 650 Holley on it and some headers. In that guise he'd have attracted the "Old School" guys like myself. The way it was it was too "New school" for purists, and too "Old School" for the guys who want supercharged LS motors and six-speeds,rack&pinion steering etc. I told him to leave the engine alone,that most people wouldn't care or know what it was-to them one 350 Chevy is as good as another- but change the wheels and the dash and he'd probably sell it quick. Typical-"But if I'm selling it why would I want to put any money into it?"  Because you haven't been able to sell it the way it is, and with the small changes I suggested you may not only sell it quick, but you might get a higher price because in the eyes of the buyers-your targeting-let's face it-no one under 40 wants a 1970 El Camino- the old guys only want it if it's "Right". I tried to explain by using a few different examples. "Ok." I said-a '68 Camaro with a 327 and a 4-speed with a Hurst Competition Plus shifter ( in place of that god-awful Muncie unit ),that has headers and an Edelbrock Tarantula Intake with a 650 Holley on it, Mickey Thompson Valve Covers, 15" Cragar S/S mags and Lakewood traction bars is just as "Right" now as it was in say-1971. A '68 Camaro with a nitrous-fed Fuel-Injected LS motor, Recaro seats, a richmond six-speed, and 19" inch Center Lines is "Wrong" in more ways than I can count. A '69 Mustang with a 390 with headers, a 428 CJ cam, a dual-quad Shelby intake with two Carter AFBs on it and a B&M stall converter and shift kit in the C6 tranny and shod with 15" ET slot mags, and louvers on the rear window is just as badass now as it was in 1970. A '69 Mustang with with a fuel-injected, supercharged Coyote engine backed by a 6-speed automatic and shod with 20" wheels is a lame horse, not matter how fast it is. A '55 Chevy with the front bumper removed,radiused rear wheelwells, a straight front axle, and a snarling solid-lifter small or big-block backed by a Muncie 4-speed is a badass Tribute to '60's style "Gasser" drag cars and street racers of the time. The '55 in "American Graffiti" and "Two-Lane Blacktop" still had the bumper-but you get the drift.  A '55 with a Tuned-Port Injected 383 backed by a 700R4, on a Morrison 'Vette chassis with 4-wheel disc brakes,rack&pinion steering and 20" inch wheels is an abomination before God and everyone else. See what I'm saying?  He didn't. Like talking to the wall. I've said it before-it's your car-you can do any damn thing you want with it. But if you want to sell it for top dollar-it has to be what the mainstream buyer wants-not YOUR dream car-which-the further it is from "Mainstream"-the fewer people are gong to be interested in it-like the '57 T-Bird with the Pontiac engine I mentioned or the '67 Camaro with the Toyota Supra running gear. Those guys think their cars are ultra-cool. Do you think either of them has a snowball's chance in hell of ever selling to a Ford guy, or a Pontiac guy, or a Chevy guy, or an Import Tuner?  No!!!  Tha'ts the point I was trying to make. Mastermind    

Playing with junk.....And maybe making something really cool......

A friend of mine owns a junkyard and he and I have talked many times about building cool stuff the factories never did. Here's a few that I think would be easy to build and cool to have. # 1. 1968-72 "GTO / 442 / GS 455" El Camino / Sprint. Buy a beater El Camino and put the front clip you want on it-be it Pontiac, Olds or Buick. The engine swap would be easy-you'd just have to get a BOP bolt-pattern TH350 or bellhousing if you wanted to run a stick. How cool would a "Sprint" be with a GTO front end, a snarling 400 or 455 Pontiac under the hood and painted like a Judge? Or go the Olds route and use a 403 or 455 Olds V8 and paint it like a Hurst / Olds. Or go Buick and do it like a GSX.  I think these would be way cool.  # 2. Muscle Wagons. Because of their long wheelbase and excellent weight distribution, a wagon actually makes a good drag racer. The obvious choices are 1968-72 LeMans and Olds Cutlass wagons because most of these would have a 400 or 455 V8 under the hood,and have a TH400 tranny, front disc brakes, and heavy-duty suspension stock. Again, I think it would be cool to have a "GTO" or "442 / Hurst / Olds" wagon. They'd cetainly make a cooler driver if you have kids than a Tahoe or Jeep Cherokee!  You could build an "SS454" wagon-but it would cost more as most Malibu wagons were small-block powered and you'd have to swap in the Rat Motor, but it would still be doable for not a ton of money; it just wouldn't be as easy as it would be with the Pontiac or Olds models that would have the big-inch engines standard. And your not limited to GM stuff here. Their a little harder to find-for whatever reason Chrysler didn't sell as many mid-size wagons as GM did-but it would be pretty easy to buy a Satellite / Coronet wagon and build a Road Runner / GTX / Super Bee wagon. The up side is no one is fighting with machetes for old Mopar wagons, most would have 383 , 400 or 440 cubes under the hood, and the parts and trim and graphics are readily available. How cool would a 440 / Six-Pack Super Bee wagon be? Especially if you put the hidden headlight Charger front clip and an "Air Grabber" hood on a '71-74 model?  Pretty damn cool if you ask me. You could also do a "Wood Brothers" NASCAR themed Mercury Montego wagon or a "Starsky and Hutch" Torino wagon. Most of these would have 351C or 429 / 460 motivation so building power wouldn't be an issue... # 3. 1981-87 "Grand National" El Camino. The cheap way would be to buy a beater '78-87 Elky an put the '81-87 Buick Regal front clip on it and paint it jet-black. Horsepower would be no problem-there's more speed equipment for the Small-block Chevy than anything else on the planet. A snarling 383 stroker would be the easiest and most cost-effective way to big power. The second easiest way would be if the Regal donor had the 307 Olds V8 for power and the Elky was a V6 model. You could grab the motor mounts and accesories and the 200R4 tranny-and swap in a 350 or 403 Olds V8 and a 4-speed automatic. Edelbrock claims 397 hp and 400 lbs of torque from their Olds Performer RPM package and that's on a 350-a 403 would have well over 400 ponies which would make this little hybrid an absolute rocket. And it would be easier than trying to change from a Buick V6 back to Chevy power. The third way would be find a wrecked Bonneville SSEI, Gran Prix or Buick Riviera from the late '90's and get the Supercharged 3.8 V6 and all the wiring out of that. Now there's going to be people saying why not transplant a real GN powertrain into the Elky?  Really? Who's going to cut up a Grand National that's worth major bucks to play with an El Camino that's not worth squat?  The only case where that's feasible would be if you had a GN and it got broadsided and totalled,with the frame bent in half, but the front clip,and engine and tranny were unscathed. Not very likely-so the cost -effective way is the ways I laid out. But it would look cool, and haul in more ways than one. # 4. 1977-79 Lincoln MK V Ranchero. The '77-79 Rancheros were based on the LTD II platform, which was the same chassis as the Lincoln MK V. It would be pretty easy to put the slick-looking, hidden headlight front clip off a MK V onto the Ranchero. If you had a 460 model ( or if the MK V donor car did ) you'd have a unique, badass ride for low bucks. If you had a 351 / 400M model-there's a lot of speed equipment available for them-so building power wouldn't be too hard. Any of these would be cool, unique drivers in my opinion. Mastermind.        

Some full-sizes that would make cool cruisers......

The '60's were full of cool full-size cars. Everyone is fighting over the musclecars so often the full-sizes are overlooked. Here's a few that I think would be really fun to have. # 1. 1966-70 Olds Toronado. Yes, I know their front-wheel drive. But if you live in a state where it snows, that's a plus factor. And they have the swoopy, fastback, hidden headlight styling that's still cool almost 50 years later. The killer "George Stark" drove a black Toronado with a bumper sticker that said "A High Toned Son of a Bitch" in the book and movie version of Stephen King's thriller "The Dark Half." And they have 425 or 455 cubes under the hood. Car Life's 1970 Toro test car-weighing 4,700 lbs-ripped through the 1/4 in 15.0 seconds.  Which brings up another badass front-driver...# 2. 1967-68 Cadillac Eldorado. I personally think these are one of the best looking cars that GM ever put out. Hidden headlights and the sharp edges and that semi-formal roof line-you have to paint it black, gold, silver or Pearl white and tint the windows. I can hear George Thorogood playing "Bad to the Bone." And with 472 cubes under that long hood-you have the "Go" along with the "Show". # 3. 1967-68 Pontiac Gran Prix. The last full-size GP before they down-sized to the "A" body platform in 1969. Hidden headlights, fastback styling, luxurious interiors and 400 or 428 cubes under the hood. What's not to like? Ray Liotta drove a '68 Model in "Goodfellas", and Tom Cruise's parents had a '67 in "Knight and Day."  # 4. 1967-69 Olds Delta 88 Coupe. Cool fastback styling-GM was really into it- in the late '60's-have you figured that out? Anyhow-cool interiors and 425 or 455 cubes under that long hood. # 5. 1967-69 Ford Thunderbird. Great styling, luxurious interiors, and 390 or 428 cubes under the hood. I personally think this is the best-looking T-Bird Ford ever put out. I'd want a 2 door coupe, but a lot of people like the 4-door model with the "Suicide" doors. You can't go wrong either way. #6. 1970-71 Plymouth Sport Fury. Hidden headlights,swoopy styling and 383 or 440 cubes under the hood. Peter Graves drove one on "Mission: Impossible."  Sometimes bigger really is better.....Mastermind

Some "Oddball" Pontiacs that might be cool....

Pontiac always tried to have innovative stuff even if it didn't always go over with the buying public. Here's a few that would be cool to have.  # 1. 1967-68 OHC 6-cylinder Firebird. That's not a Typo. In 1967-68 you could get a Firebird with a 250 inch overhead cam straight six that made 215 hp and had a four-barrel carb. Transmissions were either a 4-speed or an automatic. Since the '67-68 Firebirds were light-about 3300 lbs-they were pretty good performers-they have the same power to weight ratio as a Tuned Port Injected LB9 '85 IROC-Z Camaro. However-with gas about 30 cents a gallon and the musclecar craze in full swing-nobody cared about a 215 hp Firebird that got good gas mileage. Everyone wanted the mighty 400 V8. They still do-which lucky for you if you want a "cammer" six model-keeps the prices low even though their kind of rare. # 2. 1967-68 "Turnpike" Edition GTO. For some insane reason someone in GM marketing thought that replacing the GTO's standard 350 hp 400 4bbl V8, 3-speed manual trans and 3.36:1 gearing with a 265 hp 2bbl 400, a TH400 automatic and 2.93:1 salt-flats gearing would sell like hot cakes. ( Olds oddly did the same thing with the 442 those years ). Like with "New Coke" the public was not amused. No one wanted a GTO that had no balls, and got 16 mpg instead of 12. Their not worth anything other than the fact that you may have a clean GTO body. And Pontiac collectors snub them like the plague so you may be able to find a deal on one. The upside is installing a 4bbl carb & intake is easy, as is swapping the 2.93:1 gears for something like 3.55:1 to get the performance to back up the image. # 3. 1968-69 Firebird / Tempest 350 HO. Insurance companies were already raising rates on big-block cars so Pontiac countered with a hot-rodded 350 in the Tempest and the Firebird. These actually came about because the engineers were trying to build a lower-priced GTO to compete with the hot-selling Plymouth Road Runner. The prototype was a strippy Tempest coupe with a hotted-up 350 and a 4-speed; it was tentatively name "E.T."-for "Elapsed Time"-get it?  In testing it beat a 383 Road Runner in a drag race. DeLorean had a fit and said there would never be a GTO with an engine smaller than 400 cubes as long as he was in charge. The "ET" somehow morphed into the "Judge". However the engineers like the performance of the package and the fact that it could be priced lower than the 400 versions and would get lower insurance rates with the smaller engine. DeLorean said they couldn't put it in the GTO-he didn't say anything about the Tempest or the Firebird.  They were rated at 325 hp-within 25 hp of the GTO's standard 400's 350 hp rating. Think about this-all a 250 hp 302 or 290 hp 351 Mustang or a 275 hp 327 or 295 hp 350 Camaro would see of the 325 hp Firebird would be it's taillights. Ditto for the Tempest against a small-block Chevelle. Again-although these 350 HO models are fairly rare-people are fighting with machetes for 400 versions. You can buy these several thousand dollars cheaper than a same-condition 400 model. # 4. 1973-75 Grand Am. These were based on the LeMans chassis. 400 cubes standard, with 455 optional. You could even get a 4-speed with the 400, although the 455s were limited to a TH400. 34,000 were built in 1973 alone-so their not a moon rock. And any suspension or brake upgrades that fit a Chevelle fit these cars. # 5. 1974 Ventura GTO. Often called the "Best Nova Ever Built". These were based on the "X" body-( read Nova ) platform. They had a 350 V8 backed by a 4-speed or a TH350, front and rear sway bars, front disc brakes and a Trans-Am style "Shaker" hood scoop. 7,058 were built. The bonus is a 400 or 455 is a bolt-in swap, which would make a badass sleeper. I know-I took the 400 out of my wrecked '77 T/A and stuffed it into a '71 Ventura. Anyhow-some would say these aren't collectible, just weird-but they are unique and fun to drive and might be fun to play with. Mastermind