No you didn't, Jethro!!!

I've touched on this before, but I've heard so much of it lately that I feel I must revisit it. Nothing is more offensive than some Goober swearing on a stack of bibles that he or his best friend or brother "Had one just like that."  I've demanded that some of these people produce pictures or VIN numbers, or window stickers, or build sheets, anything to see if they really did have the "Moon Rock" that they claim to. And every single one was lying or just stupid and innocently mistaken. The innocently mistaken category usually goes to women. Not to be sexist-but I don't expect any woman-except my mother-who besides being married to my dad had 2 sons, a brother, a son-in-law,and numerous nephews, and grandkids who are all hardcore gearheads,cops,mechanics, racers and car restorers-to know what a Yenko Camaro, or a "Macho T/A" is, or what the letters "L82", "LT-1" or "L88" mean on a Corvette. For example, the nice lady that swore she had a car "Just Like" the one on the Don Johnson cop show "Nash Bridges".  Johnsons character had a 1971, 4-speed, Hemi Cuda convertible. She did have an orange Barracuda drop-top with white inteiror, but it was a 318 / Automatic!!  Not quite the same thing !!!  I'll also forgive the sexy 50 something Cougar that told me she had a Mustang that she bought brand-new that was  "Just Like" my neighbor's Boss 302. She showed me the car-it was a Hugger Orange fastback with black stripes and factory rear window louvers and Magnum 500 wheels, but it was a Mach 1 with a 351C, not a Boss 302. In her defense, the striping looks awfully close.  However, I do NOT forgive the Yahoo who swore he had one "Just Like" my one of 1,097 ever built 1973 Hurst / Olds, and produced a picture of a two-door 1977 Cutlasss Supreme. Not only was it the wrong year, It wasn't even a 442, much less an H/O!!  Or the clown that swore he had an El Camino "Exactly" like the one my buddy had. Except my pal's was a 4-speed, disc-braked, air-conditioned SS396 with the"Cowl Induction" hood. The idiot's was silver with a black vinyl top, but the similarity ended there.  His was a 307 / automatic with 4-wheel drum brakes,the flat hood, no guages and no a/c. Yeah, twins. The ultimate moron, however said he had a car "Just like" my friends ultra-rare L69 tri-power, 1966 Olds 442. Except his was a convertible! We waited a half-hour for this clown to drive home and bring his car back to the Hot August Nights event we were at, becuase while there are 1966 442 convertibles, neither of us had ever seen or heard of an L69 convertible, or seen a build sheet on one, or one featured in a magazine. The few documented examples, are all hardtops like my pals. This putz shows up in a 1967 Buick Skylark convertible with a 340 / Super Turbine 300 ( Read Powerglide ) drive train!! Not only was it the wrong year, and NOT a tri-power 442, it wasn't even an Oldsmobile!!!  So please, next time you see a Hemi Super Bee, or a pristine Ram Air IV Judge, please don't tell the owner that you had one just like it, just because you had a Purple 318 Coronet, or an orange LeMans!!  The guy may snap and pull Patrick Swayze's "Roadhouse" move-( Break your adam's apple and watch you choke to death on your own blood.)  Or he'll at least want to. Mastermind         

More on "Cloning".....

Taking a six-cylinder, 3-speed Camaro, and installing a mild 350, a 4-speed, and adding a cowl induction hood, rally stripes and Z/28 emblems isn't a sin as long as you don't try to pass it off as the real deal. If you buy a '70 Mustang and put Edelbrock or Trick Flow "Clevor" heads and intake on the 302 to make a "Boss 302" replica engine, you haven't hurt anyone or compromised the value of the car. ( How much is a 302 2bbl Sportsroof worth anyway? The bodys good if your cloning a Boss or swapping in a 428, otherwise not much ). If you buy a '69 LeMans and put a GTO front end on it, paint it like a Judge, and put Edelbrock Performer RPM Heads and cam ( They are patterned exactly after the factory RAIV stuff ) on a 400 and have a blast driving it, you haven't committed a crime. Unless you try to sell it as a real Judge to some unsuspecting fool with more money than brains. Any sharp Pontiac enthusiast would spot a fake a mile away. The point is, you can have the look and feel of an ultra-rare car at a fraction of the price as long as you don't care about serial numbers. A Mopar Performance 426 crate Hemi costs 15 grand, and you'll proabably have to pay at least 15 or 20 grand for a decent 383 Road Runner. Assuming you can do the engine swap yourself, now you've got a Hemi Road Runner for around 35-40 grand. Not Cheap, but that's a lot less than the 100K on up that "Original" Hemi cars are bringing, even in this recession. That's the beauty of the old musclecars-they were all based on a lesser model, so there's plenty of raw material out there. Now that GMPP is selling 427 crate engines, you could even build a Yenko clone or a Baldwin-Motion clone out of a base Camaro. As prices on the rare birds rise higher and higher, this might be the only way some of us can enjoy the car of our dreams. When you blast up to 5,500 rpm up an on-ramp, you won't be thinking about serial numbers. Mastermind 

"Clone" doesn't mean to the nth degree...and a zillion dollars.....

Talked to a guy the other day who claimed to have 80K in a 1968 Shelby GT500 clone. I said-"Why didn't you just buy a real one?" "I've seen some needing restoration for as low as 25K." "I saw a nice driver quality one for $44,500 in Hemmings, and I've seen concours show winners for 50-70K."  " No offense, but if I was going to drop that kind of cash, I'd want the real deal."  "None taken." "I thought I could build a clone for about 25 grand, but it just kind of snowballed." What this guy did was buy everything to make a Shelby GT500  "Just as it left the factory". Except it wasn't a Shelby, it was just a garden-variety 289 fastback Mustang that he was starting with. "Do you know how hard it was and expensive it was to find a 428 and a Top-Loader 4-speed with 1968 date codes?" "And then I had to have them rebuilt." "And I had to chase down the clutch linkage because the base car was an automatic." When I pointed out that any junkyard 390 from 1963-76 would look just like a 428, and with help from Edelbrock-( Performer RPM Heads, cam and intake ) could run like one, and that there were automatic GT500s and that using a junkyard or tranny shop C6 or FMX automatic would have been a lot easier and cheaper than the 4-speed conversion, or that he could have used a BW T10 for a lot less money if he had to have the stick, he was stunned. "But it wouldn't be right!" He wailed. "I hate to break this to you, but it's not right now." "You still don't have the Shelby serial numbers, so if you ever want to sell it, no one's going to pay 80 grand for a fake, when you can buy a real one for 50!!".  He had paid 3 grand for a real Shelby steering wheel!!  Grant and other companies sell aftermarket wheels that look just like the real deal for about $200!!. This caused me to think that I needed to address this topic. Let's say your dream car is a 1969 Pontiac Trans-Am. Only 697 were built, so unless your willing to cough up 40 grand on up, as they say in mob movies "fughetaboutit."  However, you could buy a nice 350 2bbl powered base-model 1969 Firebird of which over 110,000 were made, in really good condition for around $6,500. For a couple grand you can buy the T/A hood, fender extractors, and spoiler from Year One. 14 or 15 inch Rally II wheels are the proverbial dime a dozen at swap meets. Another grand or so for a decent Cameo white paint job, another $500 for the body shop to apply the stripes, and for 10 grand, your car looks to all but the most discerning Pontiac fan just like an ultra-rare '69 T/A. A factory or aftermarket 4bbl carb and intake, a mild cam, dual exhaust and a shift kit in the TH350 ( unless you got a 4-speed model ) will give it the balls to back up the look. And you'd be in it maybe 12 grand tops. If you wanted to be a real badass, spend another $7500 for a 550hp Butler performance 455 Pontiac "Turn-Key" crate engine, and it's way faster than anyone could ever dream, and your still under 20 large. Way better than trying to find a "real" one for 50 grand. But, if you do like the Mustang guy, and try to hunt down a for real 1969-70 Ram Air III or  Ram Air IV 400, with the correct heads, intake, carburator and exhaust manifolds and Ram Air air cleaner and ducting, dash or hood tach, original steering wheel, shifter, and a 1969 date-coded "Rock Crusher" M22 Muncie 4-speed or TH400, you'll either be severely disappointed, that you can't find the parts, or you'll have more money in it than it would cost to buy a "real" one!! See what I'm saying?  You can buy a 68-70 2dr Coronet or Satellite pretty reasonably. Any 1967-78 440 will do with a stock-type rebuild, a Mopar Performance or Crane "Blueprint" 440 Magnum cam, and Summit Racing sells the manifold, the carbs, the linkage and the air cleaner to make a Six-Pack setup for about $2,300. Depending on what you paid for the base car, you can have a "Six-Pack" Road Runner or Super Bee clone for about 15-20 grand. Less than half of what people want for the "Real" six-Pack Models!!  Again, if your hunting down a '69 vintage 440 / 6 anything, good luck. It's like the Cobra Replicars running a sideoiler 427. It's nuts, The car's a fake, everyone, especially the owner / Builder knows it;s a f ake, so why didn't these guys enjoy driving a unique car and go on with their lives Mastermind           

Not every Musclecar is "Special" so don't pay a high price for an "Average" car!

Every one whose selling a musclecar tells the buyer how unique it is, because their trying to get a high price, usually more than the car's worth. To avoid this you have to have common sense. # 1. Make sure your comparing "Apples to Apples." For example-Chevrolet produced 75,600 Impala SS coupes in 1967 and another 38,210 in 1968. ( The Bodystyle is identical ). If you were buying one of the 2,124 made with a 427, and it still had the numbers-matching 427 in it, then that would be a car worth paying premium dollars for. However if it was one of the 100,000 or so small-block models, it's not worth nearly as much, even if it's in better condition. Even "Apples to Apples" can have a wide spread. If your comparing two SS396 Chevelles-the one with bucket seats, a 4-speed, a posi rear end, front disc brakes and a factory tach is worth way more than one with bench seats, an automatic, an open rear end, four-wheel drum brakes, and standard instrumentation, even if the "strippy" is in better condition. # 2. A "Lesser" model can be a better deal. A perfect example- a 400 Pontiac, 4-speed, Firebird Formula is a better buy than a same-year Trans-Am with the 403 Olds / Automatic powertrain, if their in similar condition. It goes the other way too. I'd rather spend 15 grand on a really nice,great running, great looking, restored or at least well maintained 1969 Mach 1 Mustang with a 351W and an automatic, as opposed to a rough Boss 302 that needed another 20 grand of restoration to make it drivable. # 3. You have to evaluate how much missing components hurt the car's value, and is it worth trying to restore, or have without the missing component. For example, an ultra-premium car missing a key component- i.e.- a Hemi car without the Hemi engine is not a deal, because the cost of finding a replacement would be exorbitant. And to restore one without it-big deal-you have a 383 or 440 in a car that has Hemi serial numbers. It has no real resale value. Hemi collectors don't want it unless they can steal it because of the cost of finding a replacement Hemi, and no one else wants to pay premium dollars for a car with a non numbers-matching powertrain. And I'm not just talking Hemis or Boss 429s. A 1968 Z/28 without an engine has a severely compromised value. Yeah, you could stuff a garden-variety 350 in it and make it run. But to make it right you need a 302, that was only produced from 1967-69 in very limited numbers. Good luck finding one of those for sale, at any price. Yes, you can find a 327 or 350 block and put a custom 283 crank in it and technically have a 302, but it's still not original. # 4. Don't pony up for "Special Editions" that aren't special.  A "California Special" Mustang is not a Shelby. It has T-bird Taillights and side scoops like a Shelby, but otherwise they are a garden-variety Mustang. A black and gold "SE" 1977-79 Trans-Am is nothing special. After "Smokey and the Bandit" thousands upon thousands were built. Ditto for a "Silver Anniversary" 1978 Corvette. Except for the paint job and some emblems, they're a garden-variety Corvette. A T37 Tempest is not a Judge, and a Rallye 350 Cutlass is not a Hurst / Olds. # 5. "Rare" doesn't automatically mean "Valuable".  Two-barrel step-down engines,two-speed automatics, 3-speed sticks,column-shifted bucket seat cars, 4-speed bench seat cars, police packages, radio or heater delete cars etc, aren't collectible, their just weird, and no one but the guy trying to sell it for an inflated price thinks it's cool. # 6. Avoid cars with major problems. Unless you are a bodyman or mechanic by trade, ( and even then I still caution you ) pass on things with major rust issues, bent frames, or water or fire damage. These can turn into both a nightmare and an endless money pit. These are not a deal at any price, even free. Your better off just spending more money and starting with a better car, because you'll save a ton of money and aggravation later on.  Hope this helps everyone out. Mastermind      

Brand-New Tri-Five Chevys!

Last month's Hot Rod magazine had a great article. A guy built a '57 Chevy Gasser clone using all new parts. The rolling chassis was about 7 grand and the all new body was around 15K. With the interior and the engine and tranny-a 396 / Muncie 4-speed combo-the guy had a little over 25k in the whole car!! Now that's not chump change, but you know you can't touch a fully restored '55-57 Chevy for anywhere near 25 grand. People want 15 grand for rustbuckets that need at least another 15-20 grand in restoration. Check out this issue of Hot Rod and last month's Street Rodder-they both name the companies that sell these rolling chassis and new steel bodys. This way if, you wanted to build an ultra-badass "Two-Lane Blacktop" style '55 you wouldn't be afraid to beat on it at the drags, and if you did wreck it, it's not like you couldn't build another one!  I'm going to start saving now. I put the 455 back in the H / O, and pull the ZZ4 for the '55.....Mastermind 

When NASCAR mattered.....

The current issue of Hot Rod magazine has an article titled "When Nascar mattered" and it has great photos of drivers and race cars from the '50's through the '80's. The article laments how people are losing interest in the sport. The reason is this-all the cars look like a Honda Accord with Hot Wheel decals on them. Even if the announcer says so and so in 3rd place is driving a Ford or whatever, it doesn't register. When it started it was Stock Car Racing-what you could buy at your local dealer. That's where the slogan "Win on Sunday, sell on Monday." Came from. I grew up in the '60's and '70's and went to many races with my dad. Even though my dad was a die-hard GM man, we cheered for Richard Petty in his Charger and David Pearson in the Wood Brothers Mercury as hard as we did for Cale Yarborough in his Monte Carlo. It was cool because you could buy a Charger with a Hemi, or a Torino with a 429, or a Chevelle or Monte Carlo with a 454. ( OK, that's not a 427, but it's still a Rat Motor.) Even AMC had modest success with the slippery 1974 and later Matador coupe. Even after the big-blocks were outlawed, it was still cool. Richard Petty ran his 1974 Charger and kept winning ( The bodystyle was the same since 1971 ) until it was outlawed after 1979. The rules said bodystyles couldn't be over 5 years old. I remember the Chevy, Ford and Dodge guys all bitching when King Richard and a couple others fielded Oldsmobile Cutlasses. They did this because the 1976-77 Cutlass, with it's sloped front end and fastback rear window was way more aerodynamic than the flat-faced front end and square rear window of the 1975-77 Monte Carlo, as well as the square formal rear windowed Dodge Magnums, Chrysler Cordobas and Mercury Cougars and Montegos. The gripe was over the fact that Petty and the others were running Chevy engines in the Olds bodys. The other racers demanded that Petty and the others be forced to run 350 Olds engines, which of course would not have been nearly as powerful as the Chevys and would have negated the extra speed gained by the more aerodynamic body. Petty and his lawyers argued that they should be allowed to run any GM engine in any GM body, that Nascar wasn't restricting ( other than the 360 cubic inch limit ) what Ford engine could be run in Fords and Mercurys or what Chrysler engine could be run in Dodges and Plymouths. NASCAR ruled, correctly, that since GM was playing musical engines with every car line because of smog laws-i.e. you could get a 350 Chevy or a 403 Olds in a Pontiac Firebird if it had California or High-Altitude emissions, and since the 231 inch Buick V6 and the 305 and 350 Chevy V8 engines were offered in just about every GM model sold to the public, Petty and the other teams could run any GM engine in any GM body. The Cutlasses kicked butt. In fact, the last Daytona 500 Richard won was in a Cutlass!  Even in the '80's the Stock car spirit remained. You could buy a Monte Carlo SS with a V8 and the Aero front end at your local dealer,just like Dale Earnhardt drove, or a Ford Thunderbird with a V8 like Bill Elliot won the championship in. I really think NASCAR was killed about 1992 when the GM "G" bodys were outlawed ( Most of them ended in 1987, so the 5 yr old rule applied ). I don't understand for the life of me why the race teams didn't go with Camaros, Firebirds and Mustangs, which besides the T-Bird, were about the only V8, rear-wheel drive cars left in production. Instead, and NASCAR allowed it, they got completely away from their roots of production cars and- took a plastic body replica of four-cylinder, front-wheel drive econoboxes like the Lumina and the Taurus and put them on a tube chassis using 1965 technology. This is when they lost it. All the cars looked alike, and they had nothing, absolutely nothing in common with production cars other than they had 4 wheels and ran on gasoline. Come on guys-no overhead cams, no roller cams, no fuel injection?  When Toyota wanted to play, they couldn't run their production V8 out of the truck and Lexus line, they had to actually build a one-off pushrod V8-basically a Small-block Chevy clone. Chrysler couldn't run the new 5.7 liter Hemi, they had to run the old "LA" Small Block that dates back to 1967. Ford couldn't run their 5.4 liter modular OHC V8 , no they're running the 351 Windsor which dates back to 1969, with "Cleveland" style heads that have been out of prouction since 1974!! The dominant Chevys aren't the LS motors on the cover of every buff magazine; their the same old-school small-block that's been around since 1955!!.  The fuel injection their using for 2012 is a glorified carburator. It's a 4-barrel Holley throttle body that bolts onto an Edelbrock or Dart manifold and can use existing restrictor plates. Yeah, that's high-tech. Meanwhile, GM,& Ford  have been using Port Injection since 1985. There's only one way to bring Nascar back to prominence and that's to run the new Camaro, Mustang and Challengers with their production engines. That will generate some excitement and brand recognition. And allow to Toyota to run a Lexus with their best cammer V8-fair competition. But it won't happen, that would be too easy. Mastermind            

Were all "Car Guys" so why don't we act like grown-ups?

A musician friend told me that he can't stand talking to idiots who say things like "The Beatles Suck" or "The Rolling Stones suck", or "Country music is crap."  "These people think their being hip or cool, but they don't realize that they sound like a complete moron." "How many of the Beatles or Stones songs credit Lennon / Mcartney or Jagger / Richards as the writer?" "Almost all of them." "That means they wrote the words and the music and made it a hit." "That's a lot harder than just singing a song some great songwriter wrote with a studio band and because you had good promotion now you've got a hit." "Justin Bieber is not Little Richard or Stevie Wonder." "Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood are not Loretta Lynn or Dolly Parton." "You may say you don't like Alan Jackson or Toby Keith's style, but don't say they don't have talent." "Again, they wrote the words and the music and made them hits." "Make fun of Elvis and Tom Jones and their Vegas-ness all you want, but God himself won't allow anyone else to do "My Way" or "She's a Lady." "Speaking of which, can you believe candy-ass Paul Anka wrote both of those badass songs?"  He was right, and I thought of how stupid car guys act and talk sometimes. I mean if I see one more Dodge Pickup with a decal of Calvin ( From the Comic strip "Calvin and Hobbes" ) pissing on a Chevy logo, I'm going to vomit day-glow. Ditto for a Chevy anything with a "Friends don't let friends drive Fords" bumper sticker. When you say stuff like "Chevys suck" or "Fords are junk." You sound ignorant. My dad is a gearhead and he liked Pontiacs. When I was a kid he had a Tri-Power 1959 Catalina, then later a 1964 GTO, and a 1965 Tri-Power 421 2+2.  I remember begging him to buy a Yellow 400, 4-speed 1967 Firebird convertible, but he didn't want to trade off the '65. So naturally, I liked Pontiacs. My first car was a 1969 GTO Judge. (Was my dad cool or what? ) I remember going with my dad to order his 400, 4-speed WS6 1978 Trans-Am in March 1978, and trying along with the salesman and my mom to get him to buy the DKM-prepped "Macho T/A" they had on the showroom. ( Mom had good taste in cars too.) He ordered his, his way, and waited six weeks for it. I loved Pontiacs, but I also liked my best friend's 1970 SS396 Chevelle, and my neighbor's 390 1967 Cougar,and another friend's 440 / Six-Pack Super Bee. I thought my uncle's triple white 1970 Charger R/T was awesome, and I wanted a white Challenger for years after seeing "Vanishing Point". My mom and I were both pissed when her brother sold his Hugger orange 1970 Mustang to someone else. Before we got the Judge, I had convinced my dad, a die-hard GM man, to co-sign for me to buy my dream vehicle at the time,-Gasp!- a 1979 Dodge Li'l Red Express Pickup. He was actually going to help me buy a Dodge!! Then we went on vacation, saw the Judge for sale, and the Little Red truck was forgotten. The point I'm making is, yes your entitled to your automotive preferences, but don't make fun of other peoples. I like to buy American most of the time, but if I was buying a sports car right now-I'd get a Nissan 370Z. For 32K they offer cool styling, great handling, 332 hp, and do 0-60 in like 5 seconds and the 1/4 in 13.4. Even a Porsche Boxster or Cayman at twice the price isn't any faster. A base model 'Vette is quicker, but try to buy one for under 50K. If I could find a good deal on a used one-( They don't make them anymore ) I'd also love to have a Mazda RX-8. They only have 232 hp, but they only weigh about 2,600lbs, the transmission is slick-shifting, and the motor will rev to 9 grand. They are an absolute blast to drive. My brother loves his 69 GTO and he also loves his BMW 5 series. A true gearhead appreciates great performance and engineering regardless of the nameplate on it. Yet at shows, here's the Chevy guys, the Mopar guys, the Ford guys, all separate, all glaring at each other, like that David Allan Coe classic- "You'd never come to see me in this dive." "Where bikers, stare at cowboys, who are laughing at the hippies, who are praying they'll get out here alive." Come on guys, for the sake of the sport of hot-rodding, let's quit squabbling over who's brand name is best and just appreciate the great cars, old and new. Mastermind.       

The truth sometimes hurts......Especially when it affects our cherished memories!

Read an article in a Martial-Arts magazine written by Bill Wallace. If you don't know, Bill "Superfoot" Wallace is a Martial-arts expert and former middleweight kickboxing champion. He got his nickname because his signature finishing move was a roundhouse kick that netted him many of his kos. He also appeared in some of Chuck Norris's movies and is one of the few people still living who worked out with the late Bruce Lee. He said Lee was a great friend and a great athlete, but he gets tired of the magazine articles and the internet chatter of "Could Bruce Lee have beaten Muhammed Ali?" Or Could Bruce Lee have beaten Mike Tyson?"  He goes on to say he gets tired of it because although he was superbly conditioned and greatly skilled, Bruce Lee was only 5'6" and 135-145 lbs in his prime. Never mine Ali or Tyson, or any other heavyweight, Lee would have had his hands full with "Macho Camacho" in his prime. Or Aaron Pryor or Alexis Arguello or a young Benny Urquidez, and several other lightweight and welterweight boxers and kickboxers he probably missed. Wallace goes on to say that Lee, at 5'6", probably would have been easily defeated by the 5'10" Sugar Ray Leonard or the 6'1" Thomas Hearns when they were the 147 lb Champs. Besides having equal speed and power, they'd have had too much reach advantage. Wallace took a lot of heat for that article from spittingly hysterical fanboys who watched "Enter the Dragon" too many times, but he refused to apologize for stating an irrefutable fact. I applaud his guts. It's the same way with Musclecar freaks and their memories. Not many of us owned or know someone who owned a Hemi 'Cuda, an LS6 Chevelle, a W30 442, a Ram Air IV GTO, or 428 SCJ Mustang.  There weren't many cars that could rip off a 13 second timeslip right off the showroom floor and with maybe just headers and slicks could go into the low 12s or high 11s.  The low sales figures of the ultra-premium cars of the big three ( GM, Ford and Chrysler ) bear this out. This means that most of us and our friends had "Entry Level" musclecars. I.E.- 383 Road Runners, 396 Chevelles, 389 GTOs, etc. Tales of 4th gear rubber and being pushed back in the seat seem silly when someone pulls out a yellowed, dog-eared copy of Car Life or Hot Rod and we read that the machine in question ran in the 14.60s. That's right, your beloved hot rod would probably get beat by a 2011 V6 Camaro, and would get really dusted by a modern SS or 5.0 Mustang or Hemi Challenger. I love old musclecars too. It's funny, the one I loved the most was my '77 Trans Am. No, it wasn't nearly as fast as my RAIII, 4-speed Judge, or my 396 El Camino, or my H/O, or a couple other things I had over the years. But it was a damn fun car to drive. It looked cool, it handled great, it was fast enough to back up its image most of the time, the engine idled smoothly, the seats were comfortable, and the suspension didn't rattle your fillings loose. I lost a few "Stoplight Gran Prixs" but not many. If I could magically have back any car I ever owned, it would be the T/A, not the Judge or any other. I guess it's because I had more fun in that car than anything else I ever drove. But I don't have any illusions-a New Mustang GT would run off and leave it, and I know it. But not if I got a 455 crank and some Edelbrock heads, and some... You know what I mean. Cherish your musclecar memories, but don't be like Bruce Lee fans and make stupid boasts, like how your 383 Charger would eat a modern SRT8 Charger. Uh-uh. Mastermind            

All you "Devil's Advocate's" know where you can go......

Got a lot of heat lately about where I get my knowledge and why I'm so arrogant and smug in my knowledge. A lot of these people were quite abusive, and judging from their spelling and use of language, I figure they went to the Internet School of Correspondence, that has three major rules:  # 1. If something early in a post rubs you the wrong way, you are under no obligation to keep reading. Stop and vent your anger immediately. # 2. Use profanity so I know you mean business. # 3. If the writer responds with proof that you are wrong-i.e.-by citing a sentence or paragraph you failed to read, or by producing a window sticker, build sheet or other irrefutable fact, you are under no obligation to apologize. This is the internet! You can simply slink away until the next time you want to spew your ignorance on someone.  As for where I get my knowledge- Like legendary shootist Elmer Keith said about the hunt for Bonnie & Clyde, and the development of the .357 Magnum and the .44 Magnum- "Hell I was There!"  My dad is a gearhead and worked in car dealerships and drag raced all through the '60's and '70's. I started in the '70's and have never stopped.  Let me give you some examples of why I'm right most of the time. # 1. You can't trust factory sales literature. A couple of glaring examples. The 440 Six-Pack is listed in early 1972 sales literature as optional in the Charger and the Road Runner, rated at 330 hp, down substantially from 1971's 385 hp rating.  However, the engines had trouble passing the stiffer 1972 emissions standards and the option was scrapped. Ditto-for the Pontiac SD455. Originally it was listed as available in the Firebird,GTO, Grand Am, Gran Prix and LeMans lines. High Performance Cars magazine even named the 1973 GTO as the "Car of the Year".  But the engines had trouble passing emissions with the RAIV cam, which was changed to the slightly milder RAIII cam, and the horsepower rating was changed from 310 to 290. Then they had trouble with the EGR valves, and the connecting rods failing. Ultimately, the SD455 was certified for use in the Firebird line only in April 1973. This is why there were only 295 made-252 in Trans-Ams and another 43 in Formulas, and this is why the production dates are all in May or June. # 2. Just because a magazine road tests a prototype doesn't mean that stuff is going to make production. In 1978 Car and Driver tested a Dodge Li'l Red Express pickup that blew the doors off a 400, 4-speed 3.42 geared Trans-Am and an L82, 4-speed, 3.70 geared Corvette.  This "Prototype" had a 360 V8 with Nascar-style W2 heads, a hot cam out of the old 340 engine, a single-plane Holley Street Dominator intake and a 600 cfm Holley Double-Pumper carb, and catlyst-free dual exhaust. Needless to say, the production examples with a garden-variety 360 with stock heads and cam, and a Carter Thermo-Quad on an iron intake with EGR and catylitic converters were substantially slower!!  # 3. Option packages change without notice. In 1978 Trans-Ams with the WS6 option were supposed to get special sway bars, teflon bushings, a 3.23 or 3.42 axle ratio and special 8 inch wide "Snowflake" wheels, AND 4-wheel disc brakes. They didn't get the rear disc brake option in time, so the WS6 package was sold with rear drum brakes. 1n 1979, the 4-wheel discs were standard with the WS6 option, but still hard to get. On window stickers, Pontiac would credit the WS6 option and and ADD a WS7 option which was the package with the standard rear drum brakes. These performance packages also included the "W72" 220 hp 400 Pontiac engine. However, if you lived in California or a high-altitude area you got the 185 hp 403 Olds engine. And you couldn't get a 4-speed in California. If you bought a 1973 Hurst / Olds you got the "L77" performance package which included the old "W30" 328 degree cam, a 3.23 posi, and a 2,800 rpm Hurst "Shotgun" torque converter. Unless the car had Air Conditioning, at which point you got the milder 308 degree "W32" cam, a 3.08 open rear end and a stock converter. # 4  Even the good Buff magazines make mistakes. In 1977 Car and Driver and Hot Rod both said the Trans-Am they tested had a "Rock Crusher" 4-speed. The "Rock Crusher" is the nickname for the Heavy-Duty M22 Muncie 4-speed. It has straight-cut gears and makes a sound like a kids rock polisher. It's also about 30% stronger than the M20 and M21 which have helical-cut gears and run quieter. The M22 was only available on Z/28s, 427 Corvettes,RAIII,RAIV, 455HO GTOs and T/A's,W30 442s and some 396 and 454 Chevelles. 1975 and later T/A's had BW T10 4-speeds, or some had Muncie M21s. But an M21 is not a "Rock Crusher."  # 5. Manufacturers used "Ringers" in Road tests to sell cars. Jim Wangers finally admitted what we already knew. Car and Driver's May 1964 GTO test car that ran a blistering 4.6 second 0-60, and a 13.1 sec 1/4 ( on 7.75-14 Bias plys smoking all the way down the track) had the 389 swapped out by Royal Pontiac for a Blueprinted 421!!  The "Professional Driver" in Plymouth's promotional ad for the Six-Pack Road Runner was NHRA Pro Stock Champion Ronnie Sox of "Sox&Martin" fame!!  Just because it's in an old magazine, or on the 'Net, doesn't mean it's true. Check your facts before you start telling people they don't know what their talking about!! Mastermind

Cars that never were.....But should have been!.....And would have sold tons!!

We all know about the Pontiac Trans-Ams meteoric success in the mid to late '70's, even eclipsing the Corvette for a couple years as THE premier American performance car. And I've said it, and many magazines have said it, "Smokey and the Bandit" aside, it was partly because it was a great car, and partly because it was "The Last Man Standing" if you wanted a musclecar. The Road Runner, Charger, Cuda / Challenger, Javelin, GTO, SS Chevelle and the Mustang as we knew it were all memories after 1974.  GM stuck with the Camaro / Firebird line through some lean years and it paid off with record sales in the late '70's.  What if Chrysler had done the same with the E-bodies?  If people thought the 1978 T/A was badass with a 400 and a 4-speed, wouldn't they have bought a Challenger R/T with a 440 and a "Pistol-Grip" Hurst-shifted 4-speed?  What if Chevy hadn't dropped the 454 out of the Chevelle line?  What if Olds hadn't let the 442 name become just an appearance package?  The 1972 W30 455 could have continued unchanged through 1974, and as Pontiac did with their 400s, a little detuning would have allowed them to live through 1979.  The Cutlass was the best-selling car in America in the '70's anyway. But what if you could still get a 442 in 1977 with a 455 and a 4-speed, or a "Hurst / Olds" with a 455 and specially prepped TH400 and a 3.42 posi?  Think that would have cut into T/A or Z/28 Camaro sales a tad?  AMC / Jeep continued the 401 in trucks until 1978 and the 360 until 1991. What if they did the Javelin like GM did with the F-bodies? Kept the same basic body since 1971, refined the suspension and graphics a bit. A 360 or 401 / 4-speed Javelin AMX surely would have sold better than the six-cylinder or 304 2bbl / automatic Hornet-based ones with 120 hp!!  No, like many a magazine writer has said- "Musclecar buyers didn't magically disappear off the earth after 1973, the manufacturers ( Except Pontiac ) stopped making cars that they wanted to buy!!  Too bad, some of these "lost" cars might be fun to have and restore today. Mastermind

Some ideas that might fly for GM

People wonder about the raging success of the new Mustang, Camaro and Challenger. Well-"Duh!" The Mustang looks like a '68 Mustang, the Camaro looks like a '69 Camaro and the Challenger looks like the "Vanishing Point" car-a 1970 Challenger. You know what these cars are when you see them. Everything else looks like a Toyota Camry.  Even a Mercedes or BMW doesn't stand out from the Hondas and Toyotas. That's why the GTO failed. It looked like a Grand Am on steroids. Car and Driver said it best-"It runs like a Corvette, handles like like a BMW and looks like a rental car." High Performance Pontiac called it "The best car nobody bought."  Seeing the success of the retro-Camaro and Mustang, if GM had any brains they could use the Camaro / Cadillac CTS platform and bring back the SS Chevelle, or the Judge or the Hurst / Olds. The CTS / Camaro platform already has the 6.2 liter 556 hp V8 and a six-speed manual or automatic trans available. Think how cool a white and gold 1969 style "442" or Orange "GTO Judge" would be with the modern amenities and suspension. They could charge whatever they wanted, and people would line up around the block. But no, let's have another Chevy Volt derivative. Mastermind 

How about a Retro Javelin / AMX?

With Ford selling Mustangs in record numbers and the Camaro and Challenger selling like hot cakes I'm wondering why Chrysler ( since they long ago bought AMC / Jeep ) doesn't come out with a coupe that looks like a 1968-70 or even a 71-74 Javelin. They could put it on the existing Charger / 300 / Challenger platform. With the 292 hp V6 or 370hp 5.7 Hemi, I bet they'd have a hit. Especially if they offered a two-seat AMX option, with the 470 hp 392 Hemi and a six-speed. Or put a Magnussen blower on it and compete with the ZL1 Camaro and Shelby GT500 Mustang. The 300C / Charger platform has an all-wheel drive option, so they could make it a rocket quick enough to challenge Nissan GT-R's or Turbo 911s. They could, but they probably won't. They'll spend billions bringing out some hybrid piece of crap under the Fiat name, that they lose their ass on. Mastermind

Dealers decide what's popular on cars, not the public...And it's always been that way!

People ask me all the time why certain musclecars always seem to have certain options, and they say-"Why would anyone buy that?"  Here's the answer-There's a few hard-nosed old school types like me and my dad left out there who will put down a deposit, and order a car just the way we want it and patiently wait 6 or 8 or 12 weeks for it to be built and delivered. However, about 98% of the buying public doens't want to wait, and they just buy something the dealer has in stock. Which means you don't always get the color combination you want or the engine / transmission combo or axle ratio or whatever. I've been thinking about buying a new truck. Every gearhead needs a truck to haul engines, tranmissions, tow things home, etc. I bought my last truck ten years ago, so it's about time. I live in Nevada. Funny thing,didn't matter if it was Chevy, Ford, Dodge, or Toyota every dealer was stocked with loaded, crew-cab 4wd models. That's their biggest sellers, so it stands to reason they'd have some of those. But that's ALL they had. If you wanted a 2wd model, or a regular cab model, or a lesser optioned 4wd model forget it. Now mind you, I'm not one of those jerks that wants a phone company truck-i.e. six cylinder,stick-shift, rubber floor mats, no radio,super-strippo price leader. I'd like a V8, an automatic, air conditioning,a CD player, cruise control, and maybe the towing package and a bed liner. I mean I'm going to drive this to work and back and haul leaking engines and transmissions from junkyards, and household garbage to the dump, and maybe tow a fishing boat behind it once in a while.  I don't need leather and Navigation and a moonroof and heated and cooled seats and heated mirrors, and a backseat DVD player, and bunch of other useless stuff that drives the price of the truck way up. If I wanted all that crap I'd buy a Mercedes or a Lexus or a Cadillac, not a pickup. It was amazing, no one had a mildy optioned regular cab 2wd ( or 4wd for that matter ) model. If you wanted anything other than a 4-door, 4wd, "Cowboy Cadillac" you were out of luck. They all said they'd gladly order anything I wanted if I gave them a deposit,and they all tried to coerce me into buying a $40,000 truck when I want a $25,000 truck. My kids are grown so I don't need a Crew Cab with a backseat. I don't NEED a 4-wheel drive. I spent part of my life in Missouri where it snows ten times what it does in Northern Nevada and my dad and all my uncles got around fine every winter in cars and 2wd pickups. The average idiot doesn't know it, but a 2wd with a posi will go just about anywhere a 4wd will. Anyhow, It got me thinking: This happened back in the musclecar era. Why do you think so many musclecars, whether their GM, Ford or Chrysler have vinyl tops? Not because every buyer thought they looked good, it's because it was a high-profit item for the dealer! The cars on the lot had vinyl tops, so people bought them and lived with them. The same thing with bucket seats. Most musclecars, even with a 4-speed, had bench seats standard. Once in a while you'll see a Chevelle or a Charger or Road Runner with bench seats, but not often. Again, not only were buckets popular, they were a high-profit item for the dealer. Ditto for center consoles. And except for a few hard-cores, most people would just buy the car anyway. That's why more musclecars are automatics than 4-speeds. Most actually had a 3 speed manual as the standard trans, with a 4-speed as an upgrade and then the slushbox as the top option. Again, the automatics made the dealer more profit, and were easier to sell. Especially if the guy had a wife or girlfriend that couldn't drive a stick. There were people that may have wanted a 4-speed that bought an automatic, but no one who wanted an automatic bought a stick. The same thing with engines. The classic musclecars were victims of their own excellence in this regard. Think about it. Unless you were a hard-core gear head / drag racer, you could be easily sold a base model. You might ask about the Hemi or 440 Six-Pack option on a Charger, but if the salesman let you drive one with a 440 4bbl, your going to say it's underpowered?  You test drive a 1969 GTO with the base 350 hp 400 and an M20 4-speed and 3.55 gears. It feels so freakin fast, and will smoke the tires at will in 1st and 2nd. If your not a total gear head are you really going to spend another $1000 for a Ram Air IV, a Rock Crusher, and a 4.33 posi? Even a 351W Mustang Mach 1 with a 4-speed or an automatic feels great when you drive it. Plenty of power, good handling. Especially if your not a mechanic or a racer, your not going to spend another $2,000 for a Boss 302, or a 428 CJ model. Actor Barry Newman-star of the car-chase cult classic "Vanishing Point" said it in an interview. They had 5 1970 Challenger R/T's. 4 of them were 440 / 4-speeds, and the Camera car was a 383/ Automatic. "We never timed them, but I have to say from seat-of-the-pants feel, that 383 model would run just as fast as the 440 cars." "That 383 was a great running car." That's why there aren't a lot of Hemis, LS6s, W30s, RAIVs, etc around. The base models ran so damnded good, that unless the buyer was a hard-core hot-rodder, they wouldn't hold out for a premium model, they'd just buy what was on the lot, usually for a lesser price, and a higher profit to the dealer than the one they wanted. That's the reason why there's 50,000 1970 SS396s and only 4,000 LS6 SS454s!!  Mastermind           

Ford's "New Coke" bungle.....But they recovered!!

In late 1973 some genius at Ford ( It wasn't Iaccoca, he'd already left after having a pissing match with Hank the Deuce-i.e.-Henry Ford II ) decided that the public would like the Mustang a lot better if it was more like a Pinto or a Capri. The 1973 Mustang was the last of the performance ponys. A 266 hp 351 "Cleveland" with 8:1 compression was a far cry from the days of the 428CJ and the Boss 429, but it was a helluva lot better than the all-new for 1974 "Mustang II" that was Pinto chassis based and had 2.3 liter 4-banger with about 95 hp or a 2.8 liter German V6 with about 130 hp. Just like when Coke changed their formula, the public was not amused. In 1975 they tried to inject some performance by making the 302 V8 an option, but it had a 2bbl carb,single exhaust,wheezed out about 135 hp, and couldn't break out of the 17s in the 1/4. They tried gallantly to promote this piece of junk-Farrah Fawcett-Majors drove one on "Charlie's Angels" and Lee Purcell and Al Leitteiri of "The Getaway" and "Godfather" fame drove one in the Charles Bronson revenge flick "Mr. Makestyk", but the vehicular star of that one was the '68 Ford F100 pickup piloted ( an apt term, if you see the flick) by Linda Cristal in the big chase scene. Ford even used the footage for years in their early "Built Ford Tough" ads. The Mustang II was a flop. Meanwhile, GM was selling Pontiac Trans-Ams and the resurrected Z/28 Camaro in record numbers. Mercifully, the "II" moniker was dropped and the Mustang was completely redesigned for 1979, and it was an instant hit. The V8 models were actually decent performers and could smoke the tires even with an automatic, which a Mustang hadn't been able to do since 1973. Yet, again, they shot themselves in the foot. With Camaros and Firebirds selling in record numbers, the 302 was dropped for 2 1/2 years!!  In 1980 and 81, the biggest motor available in a Mustang was a 255 inch "Economy" V8 that had nothing in common with the old 289 / 302, and was outperformed by the V6 model! In mid-year 1982, they brought back the 302, still only with a 2bbl carb, and they actually advertised that it had 157 hp like that was supposed to be impressive. In 1983,they put an aluminum manifold and a 600 Holley 4bbl on it, and replaced the crappy shifting old German-made 4-speed out of the old Capri with the much cleaner shifting and closer ratio'd BW T5 5-speed. For the first time in ten years you could buy a Mustang that could cut a 15 second 1/4 right off the showroom floor!! 1985 brought a roller cam and hp bump to 210. 1987 brought fuel injection and another bump in horsepower to 225. This configuration would last until 1993. The "5.0" as it was affectionately called in the buff magazines and by enmthusiasts would become THE performance car to have. L69, L98, and LT1 Camaros and Firebirds offered just as much ( or more in the case of the LT1) performance, but they cost several thousand dollars more. While GM priced the Camaro and Firebird into oblivion-a loaded Z/28 was nearly 40K in 2002 dollars when they were discontinued-Ford sold twice as many Mustangs every year as GM sold Camaros and Firebirds combined-probably because a V8 Mustang was around 25 grand-a figure young males-your primary target could afford. The middle-aged guys who could afford a $40,000 toy were buying BMWs and Porsche Boxsters, and Corvettes. They damn sure didn't want a Camaro. The Mustang's continued success has reaped great benfits for enthusiasts even if your not a Ford guy. It caused GM to bring back the Camaro with stunning success, and Chrysler to resurrect the Hemi Challenger. If it weren't for the Fox-Bodied Mustang and that torquey little 302 Windsor,defiantly deilivering high performance for low-bucks while everyone else was going front-drive and 4-banger, and "green", we wouldn't have all the awesome performance cars that we do today.  They certainly recovered, but for a few years in the '70's and early '80's, Ford really shot themselves in the foot, performance-wise. Mastermind