Hollywood blows it again........

Watched "John Wick" on pay-per-view the other night. They had a great idea , they just didn't execute it. ( Pun intended ) Keanu Reeves stars as the title character who was once a legendary underworld hitman. He retired and went straight and married the smokin' hot Bridget Moniyhan. ( Patriot's QB Tom Brady's ex and Tom Sellecks daughter on "Blue Bloods." ). They were madly in love and he was idyllically happy. Then she dies of a mysterious ailment. The same day he gets a puppy from her post-humously-( How did she know she was going to die if it was so sudden? ) He also has a Boss 429 Mustang. When gangasters kill the puppy and steal the Boss 'Nine-he sets out to smite them in Biblical Fashion.  Ok. Except we never see him and Bridgett's happy marriage ( not even in flashbacks, except for one annoying cell-phone clip ). Were never told what the fuck she died of-whether it was leaukimia, breast cancer, brain cancer, lupus, a stroke, a brain hemorrage, whatever-were just supposed to beleive that this gorgeous maybe 35 year old woman just dropped dead out of the blue, but yet knew the time of her exact demise and could have Fed Ex deliver a puppy and a cutesy note the day of her funeral after she's gone?  They never explain why he has such a unique car as a 1969 Boss 429. We see him hot-rod it alone at an airfield. Russian thugs then steal it and kill the puppy setting off his quest of vengenance. The thug who steals it is the son of his former boss who is understandably upset by these proceedings. Instead of making the little bastard give the car back and apologize, of course it's as Johhny Dangerously said- "fargin war". John Leguizamo is wasted as the owner of a "Chop Shop". He recognizes Wick's car and punches out the kid who stole it and admits it to the old man and gets away with it. He also gives Wick a 1970 SS396 Chevelle after relaying the bad news, and has a pristine, sinister "Bullitt" style '68 Charger that he leans on while pleading his innocence in the theft to Wick.  We never get his history-why does Wick trust him-and where does he get his balls big enough to punch out the son of the "Don" so to speak?  Now we get a bunch of Hong Kong style action flick-ala "The Killer" action as Wick takes out the boss's thugs in pursuit of the brat who stole the car, including torching his whole database and all his money. Ther'es also a subplot with Willem Dafoe as a former colleague of Wick's who is given a 4 million dollar contract to kill him, but instead protects him at every turn, even sacrificing his own life. Were never told or shown this relationship in any depth-did Wick save his ass from torture and death in the military in Iraq or Afghanistan? Why would he sacrifice his life to save Wicks? Because they both liked old musclecars?  As usual the producers thought Video-game style action aimed at 12 year old boys would be enough. Well it wasn't. They had a chance to do something really cool-and instead went by-the-numbers and disappointed true action fans once again with a train wreck with plot holes you could drive a truck through. Too bad. Mastermind      

Blasphemy most foul...Continued......

Here's what I love about the Worldwide web-If something early in a post rubs you the wrong way-stop reading and vent your anger immediately. Use profanity so we know you mean business. If the writer responds with irrefutable proof that you are wrong- by citing a sentence or paragraph you failed to read-you are under no obligation to apologize for your outburst. Anyhow-as you might have surmised-I got a bunch of flak about the last post and "Completely Reversing" my position on the modification / restification of classics. If you've followed this blog for any length of time or seen any of my articles in PHR or MCR-you know I just re-affirmed my usual position. I have said the same thing for years until I'm blue in the face-But let me clarify my position once again. The Shelby Mustang I was bitching about is a perfect case in point. Why couldn't the builder have bought one of the hundreds of thousands of generic 289 powered '67-68 Mustangs that no one cares about and put in a 347 Stroker, a Tremec Five-speed, a Global West Suspension, Wildwood disc brakes etc. He could have even bought the body pieces from Tony Branda and cloned a GT350. But no-you had to butcher a for-real, rare numbers-matching Shelby GT350. That's like the asshole who took a one of 458 ever built 455HO / 4-speed 1972 Trans-Am an completely butchered the body interior and suspension and then put an LS motor in it. He couldn't buy one of the 68,000 '77 models, 93,000 '78 T/A's, or 117,000 '79 models out there and do that?  Or any of the millions of 1970-81 Formula, Esprit, and base-model Firebirds? No it had to be one of the rarest-except for a '73 SD455 model ( 252 built ) or a '70 RAIV model ( 88 built ). Like I've said a million times before-I don't care if someone buys a beater Tempest or Malibu and puts a 572 Rat Motor or blown LS motor in it-have fun. But when they do it to a Numbers-Matching Judge, or a for-real SS396 or SS454 model-it drives me up the wall. Chevrolet built 220,906 Camaros in 1967. So why did some idiot with more money than brains have to put an LS motor and a six-speed into one of the few remaining 602 ever built Z/28's???!!!!!  Do you see a common thread here?  If you want to put a tunnel-rammed Rat Motor, a Lenco 4-speed and a full tubbed rear suspension to "Pro Street" one of the 190,000 generic '68 Cutlass / F85 models out there, no one cares. Just don't do it to one of the 515 Hurst / Olds models!!!!   And again-a pristine Boss 351 Mach 1 isn't "ruined" because it has a Holley or an Edelbrock carb on it instead of the god-awful Autolite 4300, and Z-Rated tires instead of bias-ply Coker Polyglas GT repros!!!  Is everyone clear on my position now??  Just had to vent that. Mastermind
    

Blasphemy most foul!!....

I owe some people an apology. I have often publicly derided the "Just as it left the factory" types. And I must say with good reason-A pristine, numbers-matching 1969 SS396 Chevelle is not "Ruined" if it has halogen headlights, radial tires, a Hurst shifter in place of the awful stock Muncie unit and an HEI distributor. A pristine Boss 302 is not worth any less because it has a Sears Die Hard 24F Battery instead of a phony Autolite repro. Puhleeze. However-you have to draw the line somewhere. RK Motors in Charlotte North Caraolina the home of NASCAR-specializes in old musclecars. Their advertising a 1968 GT350 Shelby Mustang for $130,000. That's about right-you can't touch an original Shelby for under a 100k-except for 1969-70 GT350s-I've seen them advertised in Hemmings for as low as 44k. However-this one although the body is a "Real" Shelby-it has a 347 inch Ford SVT stroker motor, a Tremec five-speed,a Global west suspension with rack&pinion steering and 4-wheel disc brakes. Doubtless it's a badass, great performing car-but it's not original. It was originally a 302 / Automatic car Which in Shelby lore is not that valuable-but the fact that it is a Shelby should have kept it preserved. The same company for-the same price- $130,000 is advertising a numbers-matching 428 / C6 1967 Shelby GT500. Which line are you going to be in? Trans-Am specialties is advertising a 1969 RAIV Trans-Am Convertible for $100,000. Except it's a fake. It's a base-model Firebird convertible that someone gussied up to look like a Trans-Am. And yes the parts are top notch, and they located RAIV heads, and intake etc-But it's a fucking fake-and you want the price of a house anywhere except New York or California for it!!!  I have to go with the concours and the "Just as it left the factory" types on this. If I buy a beater for 2,3,4 or 5 grand, I don't give a shit where it came from or if it has the original engine or tranny or not.  But if I'm going to pay 100 grand on up for something-it damn well better be the real deal. Like Nicholas cage said in the "Gone in 60 Seconds" re-make-"There's too many assholes with too much money."  Masremind
    

Stop whining and either lower your sights a little, or build one!!!

I get so tired of people whining that they can't find a deal on the classic car they want.  Usually these people want some unobtainable moon rock. Yes, if you want an LS6 Chevelle and don't have a hundred grand laying around, your pretty much out of luck. However-you can buy a nice, restored 68-70 SS396 Chevelle for about $30,000 in any state in the union. Or you could buy a '68-'72 Malibu, go to a junkyard and get a 454 core out of a wrecked truck, and build an LS6 spec motor pretty easy. Merlin and GMPP sell the heads,Crane sells the cam, and GMPP sells the intake. Or you could use Edelbrock stuff. They claim 540 hp from their Performer "RPM" Package. If you want a Boss 302-again figure on 80K on up. However-I have seen nice, rust-free 351W / 351C '69-70 fastbacks for sale for as low as $12,000. Or with help from Edelbrock and Trick Flow you can build a clone "Boss" engine.  If you want  an SD-455 T/A-your going to pay huge there was only 252 built in 1973 and another 943 in '74. However you can buy a '75-79 T/A relatively cheap. Butler Performance and other comapnies sell crank kits to turn a 400 into a 455, and Edelbrock has the round-port RAIV-style heads. Or Butler will sell you a 455 Pontiac guaranteed to have 550 hp and 570 lbs of torque, and run on 89 octane gas for $7,500. Want a badass "Gasser" style or "Two Lane Blacktop / American Graffiti" style '55 Chevy? Woodyz Hot Rods is selling brand-new '55-57 Chevy bodies and chassis. Hot Rod magazine built one for 25K including the Rat motor,muncie 4-speed, 9 inch Ford rear end and Disc-braked front suspension. People want more than that for rust-bucket tri-fives that need a ton of work!!  427 Cobra?  Factory Five's complete kit-( everything you need except motor and tranny ) is $19,999. Another 5K will buy you a 345 hp 302 Ford SVT crate engine and "World Class" T5 five-speed to put behind it. With a curb weight of less than 2,500 lbs-you'll do 0-60 in 4 seconds and the 1/4 in the high 11s-for about 25 grand. You'll need ten times that to touch a "Real" 289 or 427 Cobra. An L88 Corvette will cost you over 100 grand. I have seen nice, running '74-79 Corvettes on used car lots as low as $2995!!. A 480 hp 427 GMPP crate engine will run you about ten grand. Or you could start with the 425 hp 454HO for $5995 and do some upgrades. Either way for about 15K you've got a 'Vette with L88 performance and rumble.Any 427 Stingray will cost you 50K on up.  So think outside the box and quit lamenting that there's no deals out there. There are, you just have to have a little imagination. Mastermind

Some niche cars that might be cool to play with.....

There has always been rare cars that for whatever reason-never caught on even though they were cool. Here's some that you don't see every day but would be cool to have. # 1. 1970-75 Stutz Blackhawk. These were based on the Pontiac Gran Prix chassis so mechanically their easy to fix. 400 or 455 cubes under that long hood gives them plenty of "Go" to match the "Show".  Elvis Presley got the first one and liked it so much he later bought two more. One got wrecked by a member of his entourage; the other one is on display at Graceland. Frank Sinatra had one and so did Evel Knievel.  Rapper DMX drove one in the gritty action flick "Never Die Alone". # 2. 1968-69 Ford XL GT. Cool hidden headlight, fastback styling, luxurious interiors, and 390,428 or 429 cubes under the hood. Also available in a convertible version but those will be pricey. A girl I knew in high school had an XL drop-top. It was way cool. # 3. 1970-72 Plymouth Sport Fury. Cool hidden headlight, "Fuselage" styling, and 383, 400 or 440 cubes under the hood. Peter Graves drove one on "Mission: Impossible". # 4. 1977 Pontiac Can Am. Hoping to cash in on the Trans-Am's immense popularity Pontiac came up with this performance package for the LeMans. These cars had wrist-thick front and rear sway bars, a 400 Pontiac V8 ( 403 Olds in California ) backed by a TH400 with a shift kit,and a limited-slip rear end. They also had a Gran Prix instrument panel, a Trans-Am style "Shaker" hood scoop, a unique "Ducktail" rear spoiler and "Judge" style striping. They only lasted one season because GM down-sized the intermediates for 1978 and the largest engine available in a '78 LeMans was the anemic 301. Their great performers stock, and there are a million ways to build power into a Pontiac V8, and any suspension or brake upgrades that fit a Chevelle / Monte Carlo fit these cars so there's tons of hot rod potential.  #5. 1979 Chrysler 300. These were based on the Cordoba chassis and had cool styling, a slick white paint job, rich, red "Corinthian Leather" chrome wheels and a 360 V8. Not a rocket, but a nice crusier, or you could swap in a 440.... Any of these will turn heads going down the street and put a smile on your face....Mastermind  

Here's why the "F&F" girls don't qualify for the list of Hottest women in car movies...

Had several people comment on an older post-( it's funny-I get shit from people for stuff I posted three years ago ) but I guess any attention is good attention, right?  Anyhow-an "F&F" and new "Dallas" fan was pissed that Jordana Brewster was not on the list. And he mentioned that Michelle Rodriguez wasn't on there either. Here's why. I hate to be a pig-but were talking about Macho-action movies. Sharon Stone is famous for her "Beaver Shot" from "Basic Instinct" but she spent a lot of time naked in that movie as well. As did Jeanne Tripplehorn. ( Who also got naked and offered herself to Kevin Costner in the awful "Waterworld". ) Former Miss America and Oscar-winner Halle Berry was topless and barefoot in "Swordfish". Classically trained stage actress Darlanne Fluegel-"Eyes of Laura Mars." "Battlestar Galactica"-got naked a lot in "To Live and Die in L.A."  The smokin' hot Eva Mendes was nude in "Training Day". In fact-she had a brief barefoot-in-a-bikini scene in "F&F 2". Which was the highlight of that train wreck. Miss World contestant and "Wonder Woman" Lynda Carter got naked a lot in the action flick "Bobbi Jo and the Outlaw" that she made with Evangelist-turned-action-star Marjoe Gortner.  Oscar Nominee Rene Russo had a topless scene in "The Thomas Crown Affair." and she was well over 40. Reminded me of the scene in "Dragnet" when Joe Friday meets the Playboy Playmate. "Do these look like the breasts of a 43 year old woman?" "No ma'am." "Those breasts are magnificent, bordering on, spectacular." I know I sound like a total pig-but what I'm saying is these other,better resume'd actresses "suffered for their art" and did gratuitous nude or sexy scenes. In all the "F&F" movies Jordana Brewster has been totally dressed-and spent her time refereeing the "Bromance" between Paul Walker and Vin Diesel. I mean, forget naked or in a bikini-she's never even taken her shoes off in the F&F movies. Weve never even seen her barefoot in a casual kitchen scene. Ditto for Rodriguez. Were supposed to believe that her 120 lb skinny ass could whip both Ronda Rousey and Gina Carano-but weve never seen her topless or barefoot-even in sex scenes with Diesel. I'm not saying women have to show skin to be taken seriously-what I'm saying is if Halle Berry could show her boobs for "Swordfish"-then Jordana Brewster could at least wear a bikini in a beach scene!!  You don't get "Immortal Hottie In an Action Movie" status by being fully clothed and whining-"Don't fight guys."  So that's why her and Michelle aren't on the list. At least in "White Lightning" we got a Tarantino-ish close-up of Jennifer Billingsley's very dirty bare feet, and they implied she was naked,even if they didn't show full-frontal. It's not politically correct- but were rating mindless action and car-chase movies. Mastermind