What part of "Modified" or "Warmed Over" do people not grasp??....

I've told stories before about drag racing and street racing various musclecars I've owned over the years. Most people find them entertaining, but I occasionally get a snotty email from some "Doubting Thomas" who calls me a liar and says I live on Fantasy Island because there's no way in hell that car could beat the other car under any circumstances. I thought I'd set the record straight explain once for all why everything I've said is absolutely true. # 1. My 1969 GTO Judge. Or as my friends used to call it-"Judge,Jury and Executioner". To quote Vin Diesel from "Fast&Furious-"That monster has never seen taillights." I've said before that it wasn't stock-but here's the full rundown. It was an original RAIII car with a Rock-Crusher 4-speed and a 4.33:1 posi rear end. The guy I bought it from had raced it extensively in Oregon. It had ported and polished Ram Air III heads with 1.65:1 Crane Roller rockers, 12:1 TRW forged pistons, a solid-lifter Crane Cam with 337 advertised duration and .550 lift. That would have been with 1.5 rockers-the 1.65 rockers gave it an extra 10 percent-to .605 lift. It had hooker headers and a 3" dual exhaust system with hooker race mufflers. The induction system was an Offenhauser dual-quad intake with two 750 cfm Carter AFBs. The ignition was a Mallory Unilite. It also had Lakewood Ladder bars on the rear end, and N50X15 Mickey Thompson "Hot&Sticky" tires mounted on 15X10 ET Mags. The previous owner had numerous timeslips from his local strip in Oregon-ranging from 11.79 to 11.38 depending on how much traction he had. So when I say I blew the doors off an LS6 Chevelle, or 427 'Vette, or a 428CJ Mustang or a Hemi 'Cuda that ran mid-13s stock-and even if they had headers or traction bars-they might have dipped into the high 12s-but they damn sure weren't running 11.30s. With Hot Rod having 8-second cars on the Power Tour-this doesn't sound that fast nowadays-but in 1978 it was ungodly fast. And even today-that would still smoke a new Shelby GT500, ZL1 Camaro or SRT8 Challenger in a drag race. So when I say this car was Jule's Wallet from "Pulp Fiction"-a Bad MoFo-that smote all challengers in biblical fashion-you can believe it. Don't email me and say your 396 Nova or 440 Cuda would have eaten my lunch because unless your car was running 11.20 or quicker-your the one that's dreaming. #2. My dad's 1965 Catalina 2+2. This car had a Tri-Power 421. a TH400, and 3.90:1 rear end gears. But dad was ( and still is ) a gearhead who was always searching for more power and worshipped at the altar of Nunzi Romano of "Nunzi'a Automotive and Kern Osterock of HO racing Specialties-these guys were THE Pontiac Power gurus in the '70's. Dad had every issue of Popular Hot Rodding, Car Craft-and Cars magazine that featured power-building tech articles by these guys. His 421 had #670 heads off a '67 GTO. These heads had the large 2.11 intake / 1.77 exhaust valves-( which breathed a ton better than the 1.96 / 1.66 "bathtub" heads that '59-66 389 / 421 engines had ). He also swapped the "068" cam for the hotter RAIII grind ( 301 / 313 duration vs 288 / 302 ). With the 1.65 rockers he was using this bumped lift from .414 to .455-almost RAIV specs with 1.5 rockers. The intake was port matched to the gasket and all three carbs were custom-jetted. The exhaust manifolds were RAIII that were gasket matched and extrude-honed. The torque converter was an L88 'Vette unit that netted much more stall speed than the stock unit, and the TransGo shift kit would shift at 5,800 rpm flawlessly. With it's 121 inch wheelbase, copius rear overhang and airbags in the rear springs with different pressure in each bag to maximize traction,it launched like a rocket with very little wheelspin. And the 3.90:1 gears kept the 421 pulling like a locomotive through second and third gear. So when I say I beat a guy in a 427 Impala SS or gave my buddys 440 Six-Pack Super Bee a helluva race-I did. That car showed it's taillights to many a "badass" Camaro,Chevelle or Mustang. Mainly because of traction-I was in the passenger seat when dad beat a '56 Ford F100 that had a 454 Chevy in it. My dad's best friends Porsche 911S couldn't beat this "land yahct" in a 0-60 sprint. # 3. My '77 Trans-Am. It was a 403 Olds / TH350 model. However- it had headers and real dual exhaust and a Holley Street Dominator intake manifold. The scoop was opened up can the carb was custom-jetted. The HEI distribitor was custom curved on a Sun machine strictly following Joe Mondello's recommendations. We also changed the plugs from R46SZ-an .080 gap-to R45S a .040 gap plug. Instead of starting to wheeze at 4 grand and being all done in by 4,800 like stock 403s-mine would pull hard to 5,400. I also had a TransGo shift kit that automatically downshifted to low gear below 20 mph. So if I was coming up to a light with a 400 Pontiac T/A or even say a 383 Road Runner and the light turned green and we floored it at 5-20 mph-My car would kick down to 1st gear-and my opponent would be in 2nd. Whose going to accelerate faster? I bought this car in 1983 and drove it until 1987 when I wrecked it. Up against the new 305 IROC-Z's and 302 Mustangs and even L98 'Vettes of the day-especially from a rolling start-my flawlessly tuned "Firechicken" left them all in the dust. Once in a while a Buick Grand National or a '60's GTO or 396 Chevelle would get me-but in four years I won 95% of the "Stoplight Gran Prixs" I got in-and being under 25 years old-rest assured I got in a lot of them. # 4. My 1973 Hurst / Olds. Shortly after buying it-I spun a main bearing. I decided if I had to rebuild the engine-I might as well make it Jules' Wallet. Flat-top forged pistons, a Lunati cam with 224 / 234 ( at .050 ) duration and .496 / .520 lift, hooker headers, a Walker dynomax exhaust system, an Edelbrock Torker intake and MSD ignition setup infused a ton of power into the 455. Swapping the 3.23 gears for 4.10s made it a rocket. The hot cam and single-plane intake actually helped the car launch better-it didn't fry the tires as much- as the stock motor did- but from 3 grand-6,500 it hit like "gangbusters". So when I say I smoked a Turbo Dodge Stealth or an LT1 Camaro or a Buick Grand National-I wasn't saying I did it with a 250 hp 8:1 stock motor!!!  As for the ZZ4 crate motor-Hot Rod ran 12.44 in a Chevelle. Even if my Cutlass was a full second slower than the HR Chevelle-it still runs 13.40's-fast enough to back up my claim of running with new Hemi Chargers and Subaru WRXs.  So now and forever-my bench racing tales were not done with bone-stock cars and the results I claim are not only possible-but probable and true-if you have any racing or tuning experience at all. Mastermind.